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Sick Dreams

Ever have a dream so horrifying that you can barely scream in it? That robs you of your breathe, not only in the dream, but also when you wake up? Something that can haunt you the entire day, leave you feeling sick, keep you from any form of comfort? Makes the day feel so quiet and desolate?
The screams that still haunt you, every time you close your eyes? Every other memory that flashes inside your head? Leaves shivers to crawl down your back and hit that deep pit in your stomach what makes you want to vomit so you can empty out all the wretchedness and darkness in it?


My sister looked so beautiful in my dream, it was haunting almost. We were conversing in silly manners and affairs, making each other laugh, comforting each other with the other’s presence. She pulled out this gleaming sword of silver and seemed to admire it, as I for a time. Then she kissed me lightly on the cheek, telling me she was going to soak in a nice, hot bath. I smiled up and told her I would speak with her again. Then, my attentions were turned to this man, this unimportant man we had chained to the table. His skin was gray, his face showed the look of someone terrified, and I could only enjoy what I was to do to him. Until I heard the sound of someone tripping and falling to the floor, and then the horrifying sounds emanating from my sister as she screeched in pain. My blood froze, and my heart stopped as I turned to where she went to and ran towards the door, becoming aware of the grotesque ripping of flesh and sawing of bone. She screamed more fiercely, in absolute agony as the pain tore through every aspect of her.  I heard her call my name as she kept on screaming and screaming, the sword ripping through her again and again with each second. I fell on my knees in front of the door, could barely breathe or think as I tried desperately to scream her name as I opened the door. But it wouldn’t move; she was behind it, and the more I tried to open it the more horrifying the sounds of her flesh being cleaved and torn became. She kept calling my name, but each time it became more incoherent as I could here her breathing in her own blood, it flooding her lungs make the pain more excruciating. I couldn’t even breathe or scream anymore I felt this horrible pain and void beginning in my chest that threatened to tear away at everything in me. I couldn’t open the door, I couldn’t save her or stop what was going on. I could only struggle, and hear her wailing behind the door as that sword tore at her, cutting away at her piece by piece like some frivolous ribbon. All I could hear were the screaming, seeing what horrible things laid behind that door that would not bare open.

The horror and the wailings of my dying sister were what woke me up; cold, struggling to breathe and think. This cold streak of lighting shooting up my back making my entire being shiver as my mind went over everything that occurred in that horrible dream. Afraid for my sister, scared of something that never happened. Cold, tired, and on the brink of mentally collapsing, I got up, put on my pants, and ran into the living room to see my sister, sleeping peacefully on the couch. I breathed a sigh of relief and bent down to kiss her on her forehead, and returned to my room, weary, sick. No comfort came to me since; the pictures, the screams, the agony. All like some horrifying vision of Hell that only someone who truly loathed and hated me could understand and create for me. It felt like my mind was caving into the pain that resided in that nightmare. All I wanted was the screaming to stop, for my mind to let go of this horrible nightmare. But it wouldn’t; and no peace has found me today.
 

JollyDevittaRoger JollyDevittaRoger 22-25, M 9 Responses Dec 19, 2009

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that means that ur sister is real special to u and u're worried about her!!!!<br />
When I was a child, i was very close to my brother more than my sister, in fact i loved him so much so i dreamed SO MANY times that he passed away, that i remember one time I cried real hard on my dream and when I woke up I had red eyes for about two days!!!<br />
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but what seems strange to me is that u remember all details of it, i dream all the time but once i wake up i forget what i saw!!! hope u wouldn't c those dreams again, in fact i know how it feels having nightmares and unable to get up! <br />
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Wish u happy dreams :)

never had the problem of nightmares...

But don't think about it. It'll get your thoughts even more ruffled up and you don't want to do that. You have her and she's happy and alive and so are you.

I hope so too....if something like that ever did happen to her.............

Oh Lucifer...<br />
I'm sorry you had to go through such a horrid dream. And I'm sorry it had to involve someone close to you. <br />
I wish I could offer some comforting words. But I'm not too sure of what to say. I'm just glad that you didn't have to go through that pain in reality and I hope you never do. *hugs*

*hugs* That was a horrific nightmare. It's worth bearing in mind that when people we know appear as characters in our dreams, they may *not* be the actual person we are dreaming of.<br />
<br />
The psychology of dreams is such that the very deepest and most difficult emotions we process in our dreams are sometimes "translated" in this way, because we are not emotionally ready to handle a more literal and direct treatment of what is bothering us.<br />
<br />
Some years ago, when I was being treated for a suicidal depression, I had a shocking dream where I was trying to kill my own father. It was awful; slow, primitive, and very very messy. My hands were still shaking an hour after I woke up.<br />
<br />
But towards the end of the day, I realized that the dream had been about my own desires to kill myself. I am NOT a violent person; I'm no Dexter! I confirmed this by examining the feelings I had experienced in the dream and it became clear that the whole horrible dream had been tinged with sadness and guilt, the kind of sadness we might feel if we feel unbearable pressure to kill ourselves but are ambivalent. I concluded that my body/ psyche/ subconscious was trying to tell me that what I was contemplating during my most desperate moments was possibly too ghastly to actually carry out.<br />
<br />
Since then this particular dream has recurred twice. I know it is actually a dream about causing harm to *myself*, not to my father.<br />
<br />
Love,<br />
Andrew

Hugs*

I don't think I can or will try to read this story anymore. Makes me sick to my stomach to relive it all over again. Thank you for your kind words, but I almost threw up just reading this, remembering it all again.

This nightmare just proves to yourself that you are really attached to your sister even if you assume it or not and that you should do everything you can to bring a smile on her face in hard and in easier moments of life as much as you can. Protect her and the members of your family and they will be there for you when you need it the most. Take care of yourself and and believe it or not, dreams or nightmares, as bad as they can look, some of them are just there to make you meditate on your life and to help you evolve in life.