I Found My Father

I haven't seen my real father since i was about three. When I was still a newborn he had come at my mother and I with a knife. My mother then made myt father leave. It wasn't his fault however that he acted that way. He was abused as a child and had mental problems such as bipolar disorder. I am now fifteen and have spent my whole life thinking of my father. There is a song called, Daddy's Little Girl, by Frankie j that makes me cry every time I listen to it. Just knowing that I wont have my father around when all my other friends are going to father daughter dances just makes me hurt so terribly. My mother tells me that I have all of his good traits. He would play guitar and sing to me. I cannot live without music. He loved art. I want to become a nature photographer. He loves science. I love to learn new things. Every time I look in the mirror I see him. I see his blue eyes staring back at me. I have been searching for my father and my half brother who is also the son of my father, for years. About five years ago my father wrote a letter to me in his own handwriting and sent me a picture of him. Then he stopped writing back unexpectedly. I had only gotten that one letter from him. I remember sitting on the couch with him eating pasta when i was a child and looking at his pet iguana while he played his guitar. I just miss him so much. Recently my mother and I started looking for him again and soon enough we came upon him on Facebook. I was startled when my mother said, "there he is..." I do not know what do do anymore, i have so many emotions running through my head. I am not able to add him because his privacy settings only let people with mutual friends, or friends of friends, add him. Also, I don't think his new wife that he is married to knows about me. He has started a new life, in a new state, away from me. I don't know what I should do.
christa355 christa355
13-15, F
1 Response Jan 17, 2013

Go for it! I did something similar with my birthfather after i didnt talk to him for years on end and even though it didnt turn out to well id hate to have someone else go through the same things