The First Step Of Enlightenment In Interpersonal Relationships Is To Abandon Expectations.

Oh the possibilities. The ...potential..

The dreams... That I will punish and hurt for if you don't deliver to me when you tease me like an unsuspecting fool I will ruin you and bury you if you do not give me my hearts content

Ok maybe not. But this is how most people live in relationships. We don't fall in love with each other anymore. we fall in love with our own internal fantasies of who the other could be. I'm not saying if you really loved someone you'd view all of their faults as positives but you would ACCEPT all aspects of them. This is the function within our culture. so much of our time is spent trying to create the honeymoon period of connection with our partner that we forget to mention that we're deeply ******* flawed. This ones out there for you and for those of you who feel you're not good enough: the secret they never tell you is that no one is. Cause Nobody deserves to be loved. But noone deserves to be alone.l It's not something you earn it's something you receive and the other person can't even help it. If anyone told you to be selfish in love they're ignoring human nature we can't help who we love. So how can I hold it against you when you don't love me back?

this time around I don't want to fall in love with some fantasy in my mind about who she could be, with the idea of love. I want to fall in love with what's right in front of my face, and cherish it until the end. I want to love whoever she is in all the places that are bruised and broken and that she doesn't dare show the world because they would never understand. But I do.

I want to love the scars all over her body, if there are scars at all and the bruises that lay in the back of  her mind. The weaty distrust I had to work through even though it drove me crazy and the fact that we've learned how to have a fight.

I don't want to brace myself for goodbye every time something goes wrong because it's what i've known so i've learned that if I want you I had better damn well actually love you and not some idea of you...

Whenever she falters or falls short I want to be there telling her we all make mistakes and we're human after all and teaching her to be gentle with her pain and how to cry.

I say all of this because it's what I'd want back.

yes I have learned that the first rung of enlightenment is to seize expectations for we will get attached to them and punish each other when we don't get what we want. It's not that I hunger for one that has caused my suffering but that I punish myself her and the WORLD when she doesn't yield to my desires. Hence I have suffered.

No more. It's time for a new paradigm of romantic love: conscious romance.

 I would love you anyways. Flawed as can be.
ManifestoOfThePhoenix ManifestoOfThePhoenix
31-35, M
Dec 9, 2012