I'm a survivor of phisically and sexually abused by my parents.
I'm living all alone.
I'm just thinking...
if you are not pretty or die,people don't care.that's what i've heard.
But truth is not.
if you are not pretty,they don't care if you die.
or they don't care even if you are pretty.
i pass out in the streets couple of times because of horrible dizzy of trouma,and i couldn't even move,but people were just passing by..
and laughed at me..
nobody say you need help or call enburance.
Now i'm preparing for dying alone.
'cos i know i'm going to die alone.
this is not my negative thoughts.
if you don't get that,that's okay.
nobody knows what i have been through. how struggle to deal with this life which i don't want to.it's NOT my fault.
and i'm really ******* trying to do my best anyway.
and i love take shilly selifies,then i can cover my dark and sad parts.....i wanna cry..i wish i could cry..that makes me feel better.
juryandrews juryandrews
31-35, F
2 Responses Jan 6, 2015

I truly wish for you freedom from the fear/shame. I hope that someday you will see that your abusive parents are still abusing you. I have absolutely no advice to give you in how you overcome and see life in a new light... But I think it's worth a shot - it's gotta be better than living and feeling the way you are right now! I'm sorry for the pain in your life and that you have been tormented and hurt so badly by the people you are meant to trust the most.
I really hope you can find a way out of the dark place you are in... Don't let them take away the rest of your life, you might not know it - but you deserve good things and you deserve to know trust, love and happiness. My heart is aching for you xxx

Aww,thank you very much!your words means a lot to me..i think you absolutely right.it's just sometimes hard to accept the things that i can't change or things which i'm having now.but there's no choice.i move on.thank you for encouraging me.you made my day!xxx

I havr no one. All family are gone. Just a few friends. I know kinda what you're feeling. But every so often i remember what happiness is like and the beauty thats all around us. Fleeting moments of joy and harmony are what keep me going.

That's good for you.we are totally different.i have been abused.not like yours.

I've been mentally tortures by people and my circumstances of life. You should know tho, people, people like to see themselves as victims. That way they never have to own up to responsibility. You will literally drive yourself into the grave by your attitude. The truth and beaty of life will be revealed to you again at the end. Please dont wait until then. Dont forget to remember the majesty of creation!

i know that very well.thanks anyway..