Have You Ever

I always say i don't care.. i am so passive.. people can say or do anything they want to me.. (to my own realistic limit).. but on a norm.. i really dont give a ****... but really..  its true, i dont care about what happens.. but for some reason.. i've got a flip side.. 

Have  pain in your stomach caused by something you've done? Not even something big.. but a moment in your life you could stop.. you could take back..

And i'm not talking about the usual "Oh i hurt my mom, my dad died, i shouldn't of stole that candy.."

I'm talking about a little comment that means nothing, yet you wish you didnt say it.. a movement you want to take back.. the little things.. those are the things that when i think about when it happen'd.. i slam my eyes close.. and i try so hard to push them out.. the pain caused in my mind, in my body.. from these little things is unbelievable..  I know i shouldn't care.. But i hate it.. i hate those small moments.. and i wonder if i'm not the only one..

yes, these little things hurt me.. but the bigger pains in my life.. i know its pointless, useless.. and just stupid.. but i beat the **** out of myself for all kinds of things.. the big things kill me.. little by little.. 

Snuff Snuff
18-21, M
Mar 7, 2010