Might As Well Not Have Any

Growing up I was a misfit as a adult I am as well... I had a lot of problems growing up I never felt comfortable in my skin and I endured a lot of abuse. When I came of age I left home but had problems getting on my feet so I had no choice but to return when I came back I met a man that would become the best friend I ever had hes like a brother to me and I dont want to sound gay or anything but I feel as if hes my soul mate. Well its his dream to get married and have a family and thats good for him hes a good man he deserves somebody but in the back of my mind I always think to myself were does this put me in his life? On the back burner of course seems like all the people that are close to me are drifting away from me due to life now I only got one man left standing well in this case shes a girl her name is Nantiya shes my best friend in Asia I care for her a great deal but I think to myself how long will she last? She wants to talk down the aile herself she wants "life".

I think I am destined to be alone cause I am so expendable I am a back burner guy people can push me off to the side like its no big deal and I have to be ok with it I just bite my tounge and smile.