All The People I Thought Were My Friends Are Scum Bags

I have been going through an insanely rough time this past year. I am going through a horrible break up, and I am unemployed. I have only one true friend, but she lives 8 hours away and is busy with grad school. She is great, but is not physically present to hang out with.

Last night I went to a Halloween party. When I arrived, I was completely ignored. People who I thought were my closest friends showed up. I gave them a friendly greeting, but they just ignored me. I broke down into tears because I am so lonely and depressed. I ended up getting drunk (because hey, its Halloween). I am very friendly when I drink. I was being very nice and talkative to these crappy people. I noticed one girl, who used to be my friend, sitting alone. I asked her how her new job was going. She then said, "Can I be honest with you?" And I said, "Yes," a bit confused. We went into an empty room and she told me that everyone who I used to be friends with had been purposefully avoiding me. She said that I was one of her closest friends and had always been there for her, but since I started going through a rough time people were concerned, and they didn't want to have to waste their time worrying about me. She then accused me of pulling a knife on someone on a trip a bunch of people went on months ago. This is a blatant lie! I have NEVER done such a thing. She also accused me of lying and many terrible things that are untrue.

I tried to call my ex (bad idea, but I was inebriated). She took my phone and would not let me call him. She basically said that I am crazy and no one wants to be around me. I grabbed my coat and ran down stairs. I asked another person to help me hail a cab because it was 1 AM, dark empty street, and I was drunk. He just said, "If you walk a block you can catch a cab." So I ran out into the freezing cold alone, stumbling and caught a cab. Not a single one of these so-called friends cared or even bothered to check on me. They turned their backs on me when I needed them,. even though I had always been there for them. They even admitted I had never done anything to them. They are selfish, lying, crap bags. God forbid they care about anybody but themselves! They revel in the fact that I am all alone. I have severe clinical depression and no one. I sit at home alone all day everyday. They all just talk crap behind my back and perpetuate nasty lies about me. I am SO fed up! I emailed the girl and told her what horrible crap bags they all are. I mean, who does that to someone?? Not a human being. I am so sick of being bitter and alone. They call me crazy, but I think they are narcissists. Its disgusting. I am DONE. But they don't care. I honestly believe they are hoping I commit suicide just so they have something to talk about because their lives are so pathetic and they are toxic creeps.