Overwhelmed

I am going through a rough moment right now.  I feel overwhelmed.  I am overcomming alot of things right now.  I am in the process of changing my life for the better.  I feel uncomfortable about it.  It seems i annoy the hell out of everybody, I can't find a job, I can't make friends and I **** people off.  Don't mean to.  I am not perfect.  Life didn't come with instructions.  Right now I need to make.alot of change.  this means detoxing toxic people.  I don't have anyone else to talk to because everyone is so busy.  Since i don't have any friends seems to make things a little harder to go through.  Change is good.  It's hard to let go of something or someone that was part of your life even the they are toxic.  This means even letting go of someone I see as my big sister and hero.  She is not interested in friendship.  I am not going to run after her anymore.  I am exhausted.  It's more for me than for her.  I need the space from people, all people not just her.  I am not a christian yet but I am getting there. I know Jesus is the one who is the truest friend.  No one seems to want to be there for me.  This means I can't be there for other people anymore. Indefinitely.
jpearl66 jpearl66
46-50, F
May 10, 2012