Friendship??? I Am Not Sure I Understand The Meaning.

For as long as i can remember i don't think i can recall a "true" friend. The people i hung out in school i almost never talk to and i basically don't converse on Facebook either. i guess i am very unattached to the world. Every so called friend i every had back stabbed me, lied, and totally gave me a mistrust to all humanity. Now i try not to form close relationships and am sad.......what to do.......
vydyn vydyn
5 Responses Aug 17, 2012

Well, I have good "friends". But I put that in quotes because The friends I do have... 1. I have no sense of belonging, so I don't really feel safe with them or connected to them. 2. Friendship only meets about 1% of the human need for intimacy and attachment... That's what partners are for.

If you have God, and you have a very deep and regular relationship with Him, then you don't really need a human friend. Although this is a tricky rope to walk on, because if you lose your relationship with God, and have no friend to turn to, it can be dangerous. However, I don't think we are all supposed to have friends. Some people are made to be best friends with God only.

And, if you have some people to talk with on EP, that can cover the gaps when you need a human to talk to.

And, other people are allowed to have no friends for a long time, because later on they are going to find that one friend who means the whole world to them. That could be your situation also. Time will tell.

Times when I had no friends I felt lonely, because everyone else had friends so why didn't I? But, at other times, the friends I have had got me into so much trouble, that I would have been better off alone. Now, I don't mind having no friends. As a result, I have God way more than most people.

I agree with you. That is why I like this site! People here can be themselves and just hang out when ever they want. They don't have to worry about getting caught up in the wrong crew and if there are hatters all I have to do is click on the block bottom with no drama.
I didn't write this story that long ago, I felt kind of depressed about that whole friendship business and not fitting in like others my age kind of like you. But I am more at peace now.
God is always with me and I should always remember that.
Thank you for sharing with me:)

As a Buddhist you know that there is no certainty in life. Being open and vulnerable can lead to great hurt. I have had a great deal of hurt in my life at the hands of others, but I also know I hurt people as well. There is no sanctuary from sorrow. And as you also know coming from an abusive environment that at any moment your whole life can be turned upside down leaving you with nothing to hang on to as you fall. The thing is we are all falling, though many don't know it. Give up the fight for security and in time you will naturally find the friendship your heart desires.

i don't know if i can completely give up on everything especially when i feel like i owe them. i am kind of sick of this world and society but i feel trapped and people hurt me but i retreat that is why i can't get close to people even if i want to. i can't do that cause i will feel like i am letting them down. my soul can never find peace till i accomplish what i want to.

i am still finding out things about this world

Well, I guess you could try to find people that have similar experiences/interests with you, and to train yourself to be able to trust and find new people.

aww :( Don't feel down. Everyone deserves to have one person they can call a true friend ;) Sometimes you have to actually weed through those close to you, to find others who you can really connect with. There are others like you who feel alone and isolated too, reach out to them :)

Thanx! hopefully i can really do that. I'll keep trying.