Not For The Reasons You Would Think!

I have no friends in my personal life because the ones I had wre all drug addicts. And I got clean over a year ago. And I tried to keep th friendships, but they alwys asked, 'you want some?' Or 'can you find me something', or 'do you mind if I come over?', I'd say 'sure' but don't ask about dope, I'd tell them. Then they come in and say 'can I do this here?' I'd let thm cuz I am a pushover and then cravings kick in. Finally I stopped answering phone and door. But got lonely, and wanted girl time with a friend. I had told me closest friend who did dope not to ever ask me bout it again or lose me as a friend, and I was pretty rude so she stuck with it. But one day I asked her to go get her nails done with me, then thought we would eat lunch and maybe shop. Well, she made me think she was down, then when I was on way to gt her, ( she didnt drive cuz of suspended license frm DUI) and she said 'I need u to take me over to this guys house to pick up cash and then I need to meet so and so over here and thn I was going to see if you could either drop me off at the bar and take me home later or u could just hang out there with me and then take me home, but ill give u gas money and some vailum or klonopine. Oh I was so hurt. I had looked forward to it all week. I hung up and ignore her calls all the way back to my home. I turn my cell off, and email her to lose my number and told her just what I though of what she just did and how disrespectful it was. I ignored her calls for nearly a year, til she emailed on Facebook saying she was ******* guys we went to high school with and were friends with for oney to buy pills with. And some of ther guys were marrie with kids! I asked her why she would do it to ppl that had families and wives but she never explained that. She also knows my dad is abut to die from cancer and thwt I lost a pregnancy, and she has never even said a word to me abut it, yet she messages me to tell me she's prostituting herself and how she likes it and how she doesn't care about her fiancé. That she on,y stays with him cuz if she left him, he'd take th baby from her cuz he knows she's ******* crazy. She doesn't even take care of her kid, she nice bragged about taking their truck with no car seat an hour and half away from home with no license from DUI arrest, and took him to a head shop to buy fake weed and bath salts, and called me while she was in th store, and she even said" omg (says sons name) he's out in the car and I gotta hurry and get this **** so no one sees him in the car by himself. I had to! I couldn't get anyone to take me up here!" I asked her wtf she did tht for. I regret not calling CPS that day. But I know that his dad takes care of him, but sadly her fiancé thinks he can't do any better so he puts up with it. But I think if he knew. Everything he would leave her, and I go back and forth with telling him what I know cuz she doesn't take care of that baby and is using them both, cuz her daddy baiks her out of trouble and gives her cash daily. Cuz she says oh I need diapers I need this or that for the baby and he believes it even though the baby's dad is a freaking iron worker and makes damn good money. It's just me and him were bffs in school and I feel like I should tell him but idk. He will find out anyway. This girl was my BFF from age eleven to now and I'm nearing thirty. You can see why I ranted so. I lost my best friend. I don't know this girl she's become :(

*******Sorry for the poor grammar, etc. I write these on an iPad and the keyboards are kinda crappy and it's a pain. My desktop pc is broke. Or else my stories would be in paragraph form, proper punctuation etc. I just get on here late at night in bed and just hammer them out, just as a way to vent really.****
LiveloveJ LiveloveJ
31-35, F
Jan 25, 2013