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No Direction

I am 22 years old and I have no idea what I want to do with my life. Not that uncommon? Yes, I know, I am told that almost every day. The trouble is, I'm the type of person who gets totally depressed and lethargic and can't/won't do anything when I have no direction in life. What I mean is, everyone just says "you don't have to know exactly what you want to do with your life, just get a college degree and your life will be better." I honestly have no idea how these people manage/managed to trudge through the crap and muck of it all and write papers and study for tests and do busy work and go to inane classes JUST because they knew they had to get a degree. I guess that's just not good enough motivation for me. Why? I NEED to know that my life is going to be better when I get through all this. I NEED to have a dream and I just don't. I know I want to live in a city, I know who I want to marry and that I want to have kids, I just don't know what I want to do for a living. It's so hard to keep going when I feel this way, and I have tried everything to come up with some kind of idea of a career, but nothing can really inspire me enough to do what it takes to get there. I don't really think anyone can help me, but I'd just like to know that I'm not alone and to hear how other people are coping.

zozozo22 zozozo22 21-25 234 Responses Mar 5, 2008

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Im just sitting here reading everyones comments and im amazed that im not alone
Im 18 years old and just like all of you i have no idea what im doing with my life i have no ambition no goals its like i have no purpose to be here on this planet ive had suicidal thoughts and believe me when i say that if it wasnt for certain people in my life i wouldnt be here. writing this i cant get a job cus its like im scared of the world i have trouble talking to people i cant drive so that makes things even worse and on top of it all i have a mom that cant wait till im out of the house she kicks me out every chance she gets tells me how much she hates me every time shes mad i wont lie things are bad for me but il tell you what theres one thing that keeps me going and thats the big man up stares. He had love for me when i didnt have love for myself and i didnt think anyone would ever love me and even tho things are bad now i know thing can only get better i know what your thinking ohh this dude is just another religious nut job And maybe thats case but belive me when i say your not alone even when you think are and everything in your life is going down hill your not alone jesus new your name and died for your sins even before you were born thats love the only love that will carry you trew out your life if only you would let it so i encourage to grab a bible ask the lord for forgiveness and let him in too your heart he'll show the path You have no idea the incredibl joy and that my father can give y'all. Remeber your not alone god bless each and every one you

I never knew other people had my problem too.
I started college 5 months ago, and honestly I've never felt this lost and depressed in my life this badly before. I am an undecided major, and I have no type of direction for my life.
People would ask me what type of career I would want, I don't know what I want. People would ask me what I like to do, I don't know what I like. I don't know what I see myself doing 15 years from now. I have no motivation or ambition. I feel like I'm really only going to college because I am told too, not for myself. My anxiety worsens when I hear friends talk about their future, seeing how they know what they want to do with their life kills me. It is easier to get good grades when you have a goal in mind, but I don't. I just do the bare minimum to pass. But lately I haven't even been doing that. I really do not want to let down my mom and fail, but is that the only reason why I keep moving forward. My depression has worsened, and I constantly have thoughts of suicide. I want to talk to someone but I am very paranoid. I have trouble even reaching out to the campus counselors and I do not want to talk to my mom about this. Irony of this all is, if you see me normally, I am an extremely social person, I talk to a lot of people. When I'm alone (which is a lot) however, all the thoughts return and sometimes I just lay in bed and cry. you'd never guess that I have been depressed for the past 3 years of my life. I feel like an empty shell just going through the motions of the day because I am told. Not knowing what I want to do. Even my best friends which I constantly text don't know what I am going through. This emptiness kills me inside, I just want to disappear. Did I just rant a bit too much?
I feel truly alone in this ordeal, I know I am isolating myself but I can't help it. In the end I am just afraid. Afraid that I am just wasting my time, afraid of my future.

I love reading everyone's posts because although it feels like I'm all alone, I know I am not. I'm 18 years old and I don't think I have ever been so lost in my entire life. It feels good to finally write that out. It's weird because up until a few months ago, I always had it figured out. I knew where I wanted to go to school and what I wanted to be and ever since I was a little girl, I've a had plan. I don't know any of those things any more and I definitely do not have a plan. I have wanted to cry so much because of how lost I am. Including that, the people who I thought were my friends don't care about me anymore or at least they don't show it. I feel like at this age we are supposed to feel the happiest because we have our whole lives ahead of us. Yet I look around and I see how fun my friends are having and how everyone seems to be on the right track and I'm standing still, looking over the horizon. If people ask me how I am, my answer is I don't know because that's how I truly feel.
Right now I am going to a college in Maine. I'm transferring next semester to a school near my home town in New Hampshire because it just doesn't feel right being here. Have you ever felt that way? Like you just know you don't belong somewhere? Anyways, I'm hoping I am making the right decision and if not I guess I will find out. One thing I have learned is that we always go back to what we need and being home is what I need right now.
I don't know what you've been through but I'd like to believe that for you and me, everything will work out. I mean, maybe we have to go through all of this struggling and confusion to get to where we are meant to be. I bet you have probably heard that millions of times, so I'm sorry if you have to read it once more.
I hope you find you're way. I hope I find mine too.

- Sky

I'm 22 also and you're not alone. My family didn't have many that graduated from high school or college. So I made that to be my goal along with playing basketball, that was until my senior yr I tore my ACL and pretty much all my bball offers went off the table.Well turned out I did graduate from both and I received my basic welding certification. So I started smoking w***, shortly after that, I got called for an interview from practically the only place that would take in entry level welders. I passed the written part, then I had to do a hands on demonstration which I also passed with flying colors. So I'm signing my paper work & they call me to the back.....long story short I failed the urine test. Not only that I did the same thing again and this time I tried to use some to clear out my system but in result I failed again. I know it was stupid actually very stupid. Which unfortunately I can't do anything with the past. But now I'm back in my hometown currently with no job,no car, and trying to start over. But its sooo hard, everyday after putting in numerous apps, if it ain't me just waking up and wish I just stay asleep for the rest of the day or just wanna cry and just sorry to say just die sometime. Its that bad I feel like can't nobody help me BC I can't even help myself why BC I don't even no where to begin to help let alone tell somebody else. I'm not smart, I don't want to be a doctor or lawyer or teacher or coach. I know its alot of things that people can be or do. But does anybody think its possible to not want to do any of that ! Like where does that leave you standing

You not alone, i am 19 . I don't believe advise would help you, cause it doesn't help me. Im also not that religious but ....god will place you where supposed to be. As long as you know what you DONT want to do. He will have you do what your meant to do.......if that makes any sense.

I am currently 16 years old, and from a certain prospective, some might say my young life has just started. Yet, if all this confusion and depression is just the beginning, then I fear for what is yet to come of me.

Right now, I am battling with what I want to be or who I want to become. I do have passions such as; Music, Gaming, Reading & writing. However, none of the courses in College seem to come close to what I am searching for.

And it bothers me.

It bothers me so much that I've already dropped out of one College (I was doing Music Peformance) and is now searching for something else to do. There is so much pressure on choosing something that is meaningful and motivative when I am the least motivated I have ever been.

My parents are telling me to just choose already & to call up my College right now with what I want to do. They make it sound so easy, but they still don't get it.

I've suggested Art. They disagree, saying that I wouldn't truly get somewhere with it. And I am going to be completely honest, I won't. I barely got a C for Art, even if I did like it a little.

I am not clever enough for A-Levels. My parents beg to differ, as they should, but I know what I am capable of. I wouldn't have it in me to choose various topics and still stay interested in each subject, because I know I'll like 1 and hate the rest.

Sigh. I don't know what to do. My parents are pushing me, telling me, scolding me, pressuring me and my mind just rebels. Not that my household is a light topic.

I don't want to go College. I love the idea of expanding my writing on Wattpad, playing video games and singing to the endless Karaoke clips on YouTube. I am so unhappy, and I feel that my broken family are taking away my only happiness. But how do you tell your loved ones that they're doing no good, when their intentions is to only give you guidance and reassurance?

I'm tired of it all. They wouldn't care enough to understand why, but the pain still stands in the unbending truth; I am tired of it all. What 16 year old has to feel this way? Why should I have to use my dog as an excuse to get away from my mum so I can cry outloud without the fear of anyone hearing me? Nobody should. Nobody.

So, I have no idea what I want to do with my life. I'll probably search for a job that pays well enough to move out of this house, so then I won't feel so bloody restricted all the time. I won't have to deal with the feel of my parents breathing down my neck. I can write for endless days, maybe publish if I'm content with my work. Make a YouTube channel for gaming, as unoriginal as that sounds, and connect with people who're just as lost as me.

My mum is only worried about the money she won't get for me if I don't go College. We do need money, but I didn't know that money was much more important than her daughters well-being. Sad, really. The skies right now seem to agree with me. Cold & wet.

I need help. My family needs help. But I feel like just another fleeting whisper within a world so big.

Meh.

I know how people feel on this one.

Thing is most people in society wont admit these kinds of things in a social capacity.
No-one's going to mention this subject during passing conversation.
In my own opinion, I think most people just walk around PRETENDING they have the answers to everything they want in life and how to get it.

I've gone right from being a privately schooled well off young man to dealing Class A drugs when I was just 17 in all trouble with the police to sorting it all out from nothing. Seeing the world like that, its seeing it through the looking glass. I've had the perspectives of the rich and the poor. The have and the have not's.
The difference between the two is nothing and everything.

I guess if people were just more open and honest about this kind of subject particularly then it wouldn't feel so bad not really knowing.

I think not knowing is half of the fun really.
Who knows where it's all going to end up?

Just have to take the jump and live for each day as it comes.

I'd suggest studying something because you're interested in it and you actually want to learn about it. Your best bet is to think about what you like to do, think about what you could do for the rest of your life and how you can persue that goal. College and university is just a structured rout of getting you to that end-goal. Speaking from experience (i dropped out of university) you really dont want to get to uni and realise that you're not studying what you're interested in. Dont think of college as a chore, and dont think of it as high school, and dont think of it as exams and coursework and exams and coursework. just think of it as a way to learn what you want to learn, and if you dont want to learn what you're studying then you're doing the wrong course.

I turned 18 years old 2 days ago. I thought i knew what i wanted to do with my life from the start, and I got good grades for my G.C.S.E.'s so i could progress onto college to get a Diploma in Vehicle Maintenance, and eventually get a job fixing people's cars in a garage. After passing a level 2 Diploma i started to have my doubts on whether i really wanted to pursue a career in vehicle mechanics, and after my third week of my Level 3 Diploma course I have lost all motivation to carry on, and my passion for cars is gone. I started with high hopes and plenty of motivation but College has killed off all of it. I no longer want to do this, and feel anxious about what to do with my life instead. I almost feel like my life is going to become a depressing cycle of boring hard work and I have no idea what to do to prevent it

I'm in the same boat. I'll turn 20 in a month with absolutely no direction in my life. I did great in high school and could have gone to any college I wanted (within reason) but college just wasn't for me. Spending more money than I've ever seen in my life on something I have no idea I want to do. So I've worked full time since I graduated highscool then went to welding school. I decided welding because I'm good at it and I figured I might as well make ok money in the mean time. I've been working as a welder for almost a year now. 2 months ago I got a new job working 72 hours a week on second shift. And that has me so burnt out and making me think even more what I'm even doing with my life because it's not this. I've gotten really depressed and turned to drugs and that's definitely not the right direction but this whole thing has been eating at my mind for so long. I'm only almost 20, is this past year what the rest of my life will look like? I don't know what to do anymore.

I'm 23 and facing a similar situation. I did started the University but I hate it, I'm studying engineering because my father talked me into that, I didn't really wanted that. Now I'm experiencing the consequences, I don't like it, I don't feel passionate about it, I don't get good grades, I feel a big pressure because of that, I'm feeling depressed and lonely. About a month ago I've started using drugs more frequently almost daily, and I don't know what my future will be, I can't take this anymore.

I know this was from 2008 but this is EXACTLY how I feel. I am also 22. I've tried the whole "well I'll get my basics while I figure it out" ...and nothing. Ugh!

dont believe in this "god", just opinion- there are too many religions, and self prac..ppl- christanity is only a religion of lies..-... btw- there is no "Heaven" it is but nothingness.... re-search what you are interesed in, but dont give in- for christianity- is but a joke, a, money maker- and turned native Americans into demons... 1st christians- or....lets say- real human beings...sry- but this christian word- shall never be capitalized- for their "rape" of humanity- will be remembered, just me, im speaking for all that agree... i grew up christian- tghen wiccan- which rocks!!!- then aethist, now to nothing.... just believe what fits you- **** your judgement, no one on this planet can decide anything for you... plz find what fits you- research it, and stick with it... after all you cant be judged unless you have a description... ppl want to play god, but like us=- will never happen- do as told, have failth in whatever religion you choose, and **** THE REST. Earth wasnt born for religion, just population...you cant be blind to the reast, pick yourreligion/ or say "none" what u choose- will be other ppl outlook on "you" no matter- like i said b4, **** em- religion or not, do what works for "YOU", in the best way you have "ever" had!!!!!!!

Pick yours friend!!! tough road, but **** 'em

which is why there" liars" are the only ones to pass a $ tray around...- who does that??? JUST A STUPID BUSINESS, how its been for a loooooooooooong time...think about it guy... stories over time? to make a book of city rules? c'fn on, ....BS" ok- just gonna say one thing- ok- 2, lol, sry-this "devil" is only for in that Christian bs, karma is def real- but located in " 1 religion" nor is "satan" only in the past 100 or 2 yrs- did this how come into play- just so ppl will put $ into the "HEAVEN" tray,like other religions... if ur good- u go to good place,...How bout i say this too- iv been a **** most of my life.... - when i wasnt- i was Wiccan.... awesome exp too man, I love them ;) satanic- i have had several friends.... but
they didn't believe in god...kinda weird, but- they ROCKED!! good mix of ppl, Regardless-i had more in more than i wanted to say-W/E
.... I am strong againt stupid liars, ppl- can create ****, but when **** hits the fan- who u gonna pray to? or just prove it, cause i can thru wicca- but DARK- still peaceful tho are some sides of voodoo- dont JUDGE til u can tell me otherwise.....sry guy- im goin off on my own rant....look- ppl can help you choose, but only you can be your own "batman" god,...life is weird tho, but you are the only one who can make it comfortable

Uh...you need to respect other people's religions....whether you believe in them or not so be it. Just stop hating.

And I believe God WILL help this person. There has to be something beyond just Earth; sorry but you have to be blind to think we just appear as a fetus, age, and then wither into dirt. Everything/everyone has a purpose, and I hope zozozo22 finds his.

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You guys have no idea. Im 18 and feel the same with just about all of you. I tell myself I have goals and with my friends and family I tell them what it is. And when I say them. I like the idea. But then I get depressed. I know deep down what I said I want for a career. I don't! I don't find it achieving or motivational. I found this and it made me happy knowing others like me are out there :D so thank you all

where u live, answer will give an opinion- from a christian....lmao...but true...

I know the exact feeling. I've been searching the internet for a similar emotion scheme as me and this is as close as I have come. I'm currently 17 years of age and from/living in the UK. to cut the crap, in the UK, we have to decide our future at 16, not 18. I decided to avoid a-levels and go to a college that does just btec courses because its renowned for getting you apprenticeship opportunities (my initial goal). I've finished the first year of the course flawlessly with a Distinction* overall (A* equivalent). but I've gained no fulfilment what so ever, the best desc<x>ription of my self, is... empty. i have interests such as gaming and music but when i try to apply them to a work related scenario i don't see myself enjoying any of them. If i knew a possible career path, i would then have the confidence to (maybe) drop out of my 4 year long btec course to persure my dream within a-levels, which also ultimately opens up a series of options, but ultimately, like yourself, i find it very hard to proceed without complete omniscience within my future. to put it bluntly, I don't have the balls to pack up and leave my unfinished soul-sucking course without ultimate closure.

Man I'm 25 and don't know what I want to do with my life I have no gf the girls out here are just not good at all they are like weired gangster type girls HUGE (turn off) !! I keep trying to think and once I think I might be interested in something I do a little research and find something wrong! What's wrong with me aghhhh! Right now I've been considering becoming a sheriff but I don't know I was reading a lot of bad stuff about how corrupt and expressing it van be. To go to a call for a auto accident and everyone in the var is dead men women children ect .. Or to a house where someone committed suicide I'm not Sir I would like it at all maybe have me feeling worse. But the only thing I was interested in doing any of that is they are always going to need police, sheriffs,staters.. Its a job that will more than likely be there all the time, and I want to at least live comfortable where ever I am. I also want to travel see more than the city I qm in which is Albuquerque New Mexico. Where I grew up I see a lot of people struggling my parents did alright have a nice house always stocked up on food like crazy nice vehicles have flat screen TVs in every room connected to Comcast, high speed internet, and always have extra money for spending on what ever. They are not rich or poor but live comfortable. That's how I want to be have some sort of security where you have your house your car and know your bills will get paid every month. I have uncles,aunties, friends that are struggling to her by bareley able to pay their bills every month and never have extra money to do anything! I'm scared sh*tless that I'm going to end up like that! I want to see the world or at least travel all over the united states and see and meet new people. I'm stuck and it feels like I'm meant to not do anything because that's how a lot of people where I am from are like and after you see people like that your whole life it starts to be automatic wiering in you. But I always felt different from everyone else I refuse to believe that my life is not going any where I am SCARED S*ITLESS but it better to end up being a failure and knowing you at lest tried then to just except it and always say when I was younger I wonder if my life would of been like if I did this diffrent . even if I do end up like most people I dread turning into DAMN well god has a plan for everyone and if that was his plan for me all along who am I to second think him. Things happened for a reason but I've learned you cannot always just sit around and expect things to workout them selfs or come to you. You have to put in some of the effort but think of it like this 15-20 years from now you could either be in the same spot and mind set or just say **** it and try to take a chance and change something in your life and just try to change the way we think. I'm the type of person that would say I don't give a **** I'll get by one way or another but really right now is the time I have to man up and start doing something or I am going to end up like the people I gear like being the most, at least doing something I have a better chance of being successful than with what I'm currently doing. Everyone of my friends I grew up with and cousin all have girl friends wife's kids and feel like I'm the only one not moving forward, but god as my whitness I'm going at it 100mph now I'm going to do everything I possibly can to be proud of my life when I look back in 15-20 years and I also when my parents die for them not to worry for me for them to know I'm alrite and for them to be proud when they pass. I want to be one of those people we always hear saying I came from here if I can do it so can you! I always said bulls*it every time I heard that but when you get a certain age and start really thinking of your life seriously you have a different mind set start getting anxiety about stuff but I'm going to try to do some stuff different and hopefully won't be in the same spot reading this post I put years from now feeling like a dumbass. Everyone wish me luck!! Good luck and god bless everyone else be safe

Omg lol Albuquerque isn't only full of gangster girls lolol! You're probably in the wrong part of town :P . I hate not knowing. It's funny, I found a quote on tumblr (sry don't remember who even said it but) "nothing will ruin your 20's more than thinking you should have your life together already"

I wish I was just 22 and felt your way. Instead, I'm 39 with the same issues - minus the wife, kids and degrees. I made the mistake of listening to other people when I was younger and ended up going to business school. I received a bachelor's degree in Marketing and a master's degree in Management. You would think that after all that time, and student loan debt, that I would be a vice-president of some small to mid-size company by now. That didn't happen. The furthest I got with my business degrees was store manager for a retail pharmacy. I had no personal life, because I was working all the time, and my kids hardly knew me for lack of being there for them. <br />
I have since re-invented myself twice. I started with the idea that maybe I should become a teacher. This would give me the weekends off, plus the summers, and definitely give me more time with my family. I ended up becoming a teacher, and was one for 4 years. I realized during this time that I wasn't cut out for mentoring hundreds, if not thousands of kids.<br />
I ruptured a disc in my back a few years ago and had to have surgery. While I was recovery from surgery, I had an epiphany, if you will, to go back to school and get yet another degree. My degree major this time was in Management Information Systems. I always had some sort of interest working with computers/technology over the years, so I thought this made the most sense. I have since graduated with my third degree and tacked on another thirty thousand dollars in debt. I do have a technology related job, but it is one that will never have opportunities for advancement. I'm tossing around the idea of acquiring a certification from Cisco. Adding this to the certifications I already have would hopefully make me more marketable to potential employers, but anyone familiar with this company knows that this isn't a certification that you can obtain overnight. The test you have to take to get certified are not cheap either.<br />
I am constantly looking back on my life, up to this point, and wonder what exactly have I accomplished with it. Don't get me wrong, I am truly blessed for the things I have in my life, and thank the good Lord for these blessings - from an individualistic standpoint though I just feel I have missed out on the reason why I'm here and what I'm supposed to be.<br />
I try to keep myself busy, to take my mind off the empty feelings I have, but unfortunately they keep resurfacing for one reason or another. <br />
What I have to keep telling myself is, is that life is more than having an awesome job. It's not about trying to keep up with the Jones family, and it's not about how many friends you have. It's about being comfortable in your own skin. Whether that is accomplished through involving yourself with a church group or maintaining a healthy regimen of medication - keep after that goal and one day it will come.

"Modo Fac" (just do it). The one thing I remember from high school Latin. No matter what- I just keep going. I have my break downs---sometimes change is the consequence and sometimes not. But either way as long as I am doing something I am learning. I am learning what works for me and what does not. I have been the person alone not doing anything but wallowing in my own self pity/anxiety/depression/isolation. But i learned nothing in that space.
Allow urself to be open--- open to everything-weigh your options- and then if u notice u are saying no to everything- then say yes to the next- set reasonable goals. One day at a time.

It is your life. You get to live it however u wish. U will more than likely fail and be denied a lot. Yay! Guidence comes in strange ways- I hardly ever understand. Nor do I hardly know that what I am doing is what I want to do. But as one thing ends- another begins. But life is in ur hands and u have to begin something. Rather it's carrying that old lady's bags to her car or applying for school or a job u don't think ur qualified for.
I did what people said. I went college took on a load- did my best. Volunteered. Worked. Became apart of organizations. But during that time i was miserable. I was loaded on pills and had no interest in a direction. But then someone suggested I ride with them to where they used to work. For some odd reason I said yes. I left with a summer job and never been the same.
Whatever u do- u are apart of this society. And as much as some of us disagree with it- we got create the change from within it.

To start: spend a ridiculously long night staring at the stars.
Jump from a semi-safe cliff into a deep body of water.

Tell urself everyday u are beautiful and so is this world.

Wake up: walk out side and say yes.
Before bed: walk outside and say thank you.

Talk to random people. They feel as awkward as u.

Now, I take baby steps. Nothing is forever. I don't overload myself but I add a reasonable thing one at a time. I learn to manage that one thing and then go from there. I don't allow myself to sit down and chill until the day is done. And I may not know what I want to do as a job. But I've learned who I want to be as an individual. And that is priceless.
Thanks to all the people and places in this world.

I feel the same way due to a number of things.. I graduated high school wanting to be a cosmetologist. Worst idea ever 22 grand for getting terrible education on something that I'm never going to use in life.. I finished school and moved In with my boyfriend at the time he had four kids and I found out he was married he cheated always threatened me all I cared about was being with him i felt no one else cared about me so I needed him i was so lost in trying to keep someone who could care less about me I ended up wasting all this time and now I'm just realizing what's next ? Where do I go from here? I don't have a good job and I don't even know how to drive I have no friends and I have no clue what to go to school for if I decided to try and I feel I have no one to talk to I have no friends and I feel I have nothing to look forward to in life I don't see why I was put here I haven't accomplished anything and I don't know who to go to I feel so lonely and I feel like a failure others insist on me doing a medical program or going to school for something they want and I want something I like but I have no talents and feel like I wouldn't even be able to make in through college and get a degree even if I knew what I wanted to do I've wasted 4 years away and barely realized I haven't done sh*t with my life I feel like a loser and just won't ever amount to anything I feel like there's nothing left for me I feel I need to speak to someone but I don't know who

Hello. You can speak to me :) Speak it all out. It's Okay if you don't want to provide any personal information. Just speak it out. You'll feel a lot better.

Hi, I know maybe i am too late to reply you but just came to your post via google (i literally typed exact same sentence as yours in a search bar and it let me to this thread). I am currently 20 almost sucidal..why? well no not because of bf or any silly **** (trust me, I am way more mature than my age) its just that I DONT KNOW WHAT I WANT IN LIFE ANYMORE. i remember i used to laugh used to dream used to work hard, good grades and all but i just dont see a point of all this NOW. My elder brother is in his early 30s successful and all..he targets me all the time saying you are so dumb how can you be that stupid you will never do anything with your life.

WOW... i feel Exactly the same... but i keep getting told to do a two year medical program. but... i cant see me being happy at All by doing something i dont enjoy for the rest of my life... and m family just doesnt understand that. They see it as a fast track job and secure and good money. :/ i dont know what to do...

You don't have to know what you are to become. Just start with the purpose of determining what you are not. Once you know all the things you no longer agree to do, you will discover what you want to once you find your joy. It doesnt find you. You have to be commited toturning off the limited beliefs and turning on possibility. Start by the right attitude and let the rest evolve until you collect more knowledge of yourself. Good luck!!!

Well I'm 20 years old and I don't know ow what to do with my life, I tried college and failed because I was pushed into it, I don't know much about tools, cars, or anything a normal man should. I feel like such a failure to myself and my parents. All I have right now is a job at a bakery with minimum wage, I don't have any direction and it makes me feel useless and depressed.

I can say I am in the same boat. Although I am about to be 30 this year. I still have no main goal. I also felt the same way about getting a degree in healthcare administration, and while I did start I am second guessing my decision. It is not that I don't follow things all the way though. I just lose interest very quickly. I just am not sure what I am really interested in. I don't know what my passion in...

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I'm 17 years old and a senior in high school and am currently so depressed about life. My family is so pushy when it comes to college and are so frustrated with me when I change my major every week or say I don't know what I want to major in. Honestly I don't want to go to college at all. I see no need for me to go cause I already know as soon as I get there I will hate what I have gotten myself into. I only like things temporarly so a big life decision like this is stressing me a lot. I already know who I want to marry and that I want to have kids and just be a stay at home mom but I know my family will pesterize me for the rest of my life

Maybe you don't want to live somebody's else idea of your life. It is yours. What ppl think of you is none of your buisiness its thiers. You are accountable to only one. You don't owe anyone anything. But you are here today in the present, making you the gift. You have to know that first do not let fear of the unknown or expectations keep you trapped. You limit your choices by not seeing you can be and do anything. When you don't see choices you panic. Your vision becomes more narrow. Feelings of being stuck are an illusion you create to do nothing.doing nothing is easy . You are going into college prepared to do nothing. Is the essence of who you are? Are you a nothing? I think not. Go into college determined to find that essence. Just know it will be hard. You will screw up. If you dont let yourself quit you will win. Struggles gives you the endurance needed to live fully alive. Dont ever pass on an oppurtunity to struggle. Its the only way you learn what you're made of.

I'm nearly 21 now and every single day of my life I wish desperately that I could go back to high school. Not because I had a great time and miss it, in fact, I hated high school so much I nearly didn't graduate and my gpa dropped to a 1.0 my senior year because I gave up entirely. The colleges I who accepted me ended up revoking my acceptance for not completing certain classes and up holding their standards. I said I didn't care if i went to a community college. Biggest mistake of my life. I'm floundering and have no direction and very unhappy. My grades are failing and i have now ruined my chances of succeeding (at least in a timely manor) in higher education and obtaining a job that I will enjoy and be successful enough in. Finish high school with decent grades and go to a four year institution, when you get there you will understand that things are different.

Im in the exact same boat as you im 22 and i live in a lame small tx town getting harassed by ******* cops everyday i am a talented musician and at least halfway smart but life is too much so i do h and it all feels better lol my life is probably worse than yours feel better

Hello,Im only 16 years old but I feel so depressed. From about 6 months or so, I want to die because I've nothing accomplished in life. I feel like im locked in a cage when Im being in my city and living my life at all, there are not alot of people that understand me and I cant find alot of real friendships,only some people to chill so I dont feel alone at all. Im not a bad student , I play the piano from 6 years ( but nothing that professional ,taking it more like a hobby ) , going to gym and doing all the stuff to make myself feel perfect. Most of the time Im playing computer games and being in the online community. Im preparing myself for life like learning to cook ( because I really enjoy it ) , reading and stuff. I've totally found my soulmate ( my girlfriend ). We're totally the same and we love each other but we're from different cities, so we cant meet eachother alot. The people in my city ,my age ofcourse, are mostly retards. They're totally the kind of people I dont even want to hangout so I feel lonely. I really feel the true happiness when Im travelling but Im not allowed to do it alot ,because Im still young and dont have any money to do it on my own. I have no idea what I want to do with my life, Im one of the "dreamers". I want the perfect life like in movies and im doing everything but it seems like not working for me. I dont know what I wanna do with my life at all and Im pretty confused. I had a bad childhood and that made me the sad person I am. I want to wake up and just live but things are not so easy. I feel like the school is the only life I have, when I have a vacation I feel like I dont have anything. Im only waking up at mid-day because I couldnt sleep at the night, staying on the computer , going out for about 1 hour or so and doing all the stuff I have to do. And that just keep repeating and it makes me sad. My biggest problem is the overthinking and probably the lacking of communication with people I'd like to talk with. I've tried drugs , ciggarretes , alchohol and going to parties but that's just not the life I want to live.

It sounds like you have gone thought a lot in your 16 years of life. I also tend to overthink a lot and get stress out very easily when I do not know what to do. First, I think you are way too young to think you have not accomplished anything in life. You just starting to live. I am only going to be 22 and still feel pretty young, I graduated from college last year, I am a psychologist and currently work as a counselor. My parents are putting pressure on me to go back to school to do my master, but I have no idea what I want to study and that makes me feel really bad. Anyways... going back to your case, since you tried drugs, cigarettes, alcohol, parties, and I am super glad that's not the life you want to live, then I have another choice for you and I am 100% sure this one is not going to leave you empty. Here goes... try having a close relationship with God ! yes I became christian (not catholic) two years ago and since then my life have changed a lot. Would never regret it. Also, my boyfriend used to be depressed a lot, and since he started going to church with me, reading the bible and of course living the word, his life is so different that I am even amazed by seeing him. You are not alone, there is a God who knows you more than anyone, more than you parents or your girlfriend, and the best part is that He is willing to help you. Just try.. what you have to lose?

I am 28 years old, from Boston, mother of two boys, I've been with their dad since I was 15. We both come from pretty messed up homes and that's pretty much what drew us together. Trust me when I tell you I've been through it all. My parents divorced when I was 7 due to my fathers heroin addiction and drug induced stupidity, for example, placing a loaded gun in my hand at the age of 7 and making me point it at my mother while he giggled like a kid on Christmas watching her scream and run for her life, or even putting me behind the wheel of a car, also at the age of 7, and telling me its time I learn to drive, and I did, and the list goes on, I think the endless affairs was the least of my mothers worries compared to everything else. My mother struggled as a single mother to two girls but she made it, well financially she made it, emotionally, not so much. We didn't have the greatest relationship, actually it kind of sucked, and still kind of sucks, but she's not entirely to blame for that, she dealt with much worse, but that's her story to tell.

I was diagnosed with clinical depression, ADD, BPD (borderline personality disorder), OCD, severe anxiety, and ODD at the age of 13, all diagnoses have been confirmed by many specialists over the years. Needless to say I was a pretty messed up kid. After the divorce we moved to a new town where I was severely bullied for years, to the point I made several suicide attempts, looking back now though, I think they were more of an outcry for help than an actual attempt to end my life, I just felt stuck, and at such a young age I couldn't comprehend what I was feeling, let alone express it to another person. I started drinking at the age of 12 and smoking weed at 13, luckily for me, other than a one time experience with ecstacy at the age of 15, I never got into heavy drugs. I was constantly sneaking out and getting in trouble, getting into fights at school and getting suspended, which I didn't care about at the time because I rarely went to school back then anyway. I was failing every subject, my school at the time didn't care about my ADHD or any problems I had learning and offered no help, so I felt there was no point.

After being expelled, my mother sent me to live with my father for about a year hoping he and my step mother could straighten me out, I couldn't take living with my father anymore so I went back home. Eventually, my mother came to the conclusion that moving back to our home city would fix the problem, it didn't. I kept partying, kept drinking, kept being picked up by the police. When I was 15 I met my husband, same kind of background, worse believe it or not, and we were instantly inseparable. He had been previously diagnosed with most of the same conditions I suffer from, minus the BPD and replace it with Bipolar. He was 17 when we started dating and was just getting out of foster care, his mother wanted nothing to do with him so my mother took him in. That was a horrible idea, we were constantly getting in trouble.

My mother kicked us both out after having the police show up at the house at 2am tearing the house apart looking for us, of course we weren't there, we expected it. So she kicked us out, 15 and 17 years old, with nowhere to go. At first we'd go from friend to friend crashing on couches until we ran out of friends. We ended up meeting a group of people who set up camp under a bridge in downtown boston, they had room for us so that was our home for about 4 months. I'll never forget waking up shivering and numb under a pile of snow, it started snowing in the middle of the night while we were sleeping. After a while we learned a few hustles to make enough money to eat, and no I never went down "that" route. But I learned how to shut my emotions off and become cold, so I could bring myself to steal from hard working people and not feel guilty about it. Before we resorted to hustling and stealing, we did try to go to shelters and get help, but it was so backwards, no shelter would take me in because I was under 18. There were churches that served lunch and dinner and we could go there on certain nights, and there are vans that drive around downtown handing out blankets and hot chocolate and sandwiches, etc to the homeless. But it wasn't enough, I needed the comfort of a bed, a real shower, not one in a battered women shelter where I had to wear shower shoes and listen to ten angry women bang on the door yelling at me to hurry up. I managed to call my mom every day from a pay phone to let her know I was alive and to apologize and ask to come home, the answer was always no. I did manage to get one night at home, when I was picked up for pan handling, the police told my mom if she didn't come get me they'd call DSS, they were still called DSS back then, so she came to get me, I had a nice hot shower a hot meal and a night in my own bed, I would have cried happy tears that night if I hadn't been so exhausted and passed out the second my head hit the pillow, but the very next morning I had to be out.

We were on the streets for about a year until eventually our "hustles" caught up with us and my boyfriend was arrested. I tried staying out there on my own, I was now 16 and scared and now alone. I sucked it up and called my boyfriends mother, her husband convinced her to take me in. She lived about an hour away, she came to pick me up the next day and I stayed with her and got a job and saved enough money to get an apartment, my boyfriend got out of jail after a few months and we moved into our own place. We were both working and everything was going great, I was only 17 but I felt like I had it all together, we had our own apartment, no more cold nights outside, we both had jobs, so no more hustles, life was great. Now remember that list of conditions we were both dealing with, well neither of us were being treated, and slowly but surely things started falling apart. I got pregnant, with my oldest son who's now 10, I lost my job and the depression started taking its toll. My boyfriends mind was all over the place, we were constantly fighting, and things got really ugly. He ended up losing his job after going off on his boss, then the anxiety started, he had a pregnant girlfriend at home and now no income and we were about to lose everything we just worked so hard for, and then came the "hustles", which he eventually got arrested for, which left me alone and pregnant and EVICTED. This time my mother let me come home, and also my boyfriend when he was to be released from jail, on the condition that we both go to counseling and get proper treatment, and we did. From that point on things have been fairly good, well no more trouble or hustles or jail. We stayed with my mom for much longer this time, until we knew we could make it. We now have two boys, my 10 year old who I mentioned earlier, and my 4 year old, the loves of my life and my greatest achievements, and we have a nice home. That life is far behind me, but not too far that I can't remember exactly what got me there and what got me out. I'm now 28 and my husband is 30, we've come along way, but I still feel lost.

I can't figure out what I want to do with my life, I feel like I don't have a passion for anything and nothing is motivating me. I went to school for medical office when I was 21, I realized I absolutely hated it, then I went to school for human services and dropped out after the first semester. In 2008 I got my certificate for dental assisting, I worked at a pediatric dental office for a little over a year, I wasn't too into dental assisting but I was good at it and I loved where I worked, the girls I worked with were awesome, and I had the best boss anyone could ask for, but when my sisters husband, (my oldest sons godfather) was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer I was taking off a lot of time to help her out with my niece and nephew and around the house, eventually I realized I just wasn't going to be able to work so I quit, my brother in law, sadly, passed away a year later.

Since then I've worked some minimum wage jobs and just wasn't happy. My husband tries to help me figure out what I want to do but I can't think of anything. I'm extremely depressed, I just know that I want to do SOMETHING. I feel like there's something I'm meant to do and I just can't figure out what that is. The only thing I can think of, aside from family of course, that I've ever had any kind of passion for is helping people. I don't know if it's because of what I went through, but I do enjoy volunteering at shelters and soup kitchens, and I'm always trying to teach my kids to give back, we don't have a lot of money but we get by and we're better off than we've ever been, I want my kids to know that just because you don't have a lot doesn't mean you don't have enough to give to someone with less. I've had people turn to me for help because I know my way around this community and have access to many resources, my oldest son has ADHD and anxiety and is on an IEP and my youngest son has autism, so I've reached out and learned a lot and can pass this information on to others. I made a facebook page for parents of kids with learning disabilities, it was mostly for me to reach out to other moms when my son was first diagnosed, because at the time I didn't know any other moms who had experienced what I was going through, I ended up reaching a lot more people than I had anticipated and I am very happy with it. Not only did I find moms who gave me great advice, but I found that I was able to help them just as much, and I truly love that feeling. I love working with kids, and I love helping people find their way, which is very ironic considering I feel so lost myself. My husband and I sometimes talk about "what if we hit the lottery and won millions", we both have the same idea but don't know exactly how it would work, we'd want to have a program to help people get to where they need to be in life, whether it's an addict in need of help, or a troubled teen in need of a home, or someone who just lost their way. I know there's programs out there similar to this, but in my experience, none of them really cut it. Obviously I can't plan my future around winning the lottery, I need a realistic plan and I just can't seem to come up with one. I've thought about working with DCF, I know their system is highly flawed and I would love to make a difference, but the problem with that is I'm extremely emotional, and the first time I couldn't help someone I would feel like a failure, like I let someone down and I wouldn't be able to live with that. Same reason I don't think I would cut it as a substance abuse counselor, which was my plan for awhile. I see my father in every addict I meet, and as flawed as my father is, he's the only father I have and I love him and I want him to be happy and free of the demons that still haunt him today.

I keep thinking that I'm getting older, I'm running out of time, my kids are getting older, how am I supposed to give them direction when I can't direct myself. Luckily, by some miracle, I've managed not to screw them up so far, they're some pretty amazing kids, though I may be a bit biased lol.

I need a plan, a realistic one for me, what's realistic for some may not be realistic for others. I also don't have much of an education as I'm sure some of you can tell by reading this, please excuse any grammatical errors. I am intelligent I can tell you that much, as in I have the ability to learn and apply the knowledge I've acquired, the problem is that I didn't have access to the same information, or education as others. A lot of people think that because they're packed full with useless information that they're smarter than others, no it just means you can remember stuff, congratulations.
I believe education is way too important to be as expensive and as hard to obtain as it is, that will never make sense to me, but let me not get into that now because I'd be here all night.
I don't expect someone to read this and come up with some miracle answer to all my problems, but for those of you in the same boat, I promise you're not alone.

You should be a counsellor. A lot of programs take a year or so. Or a guidance counsellor at a high school for example. I can't even believe your story by the way. It's not your fault.

Thank you, I have actually considered counseling but wasn't sure if I'd be of any help, but it won't hurt to explore that option again, thanks :)

I agree, try counciling, im 26 stuck, with no eduction too.

You’ve been through a lot. If I were in your position, I don’t think I could have managed
it as well as you have, and I say well because you got out of it and demonstrated it is possible. In my case, I had what its considered a "normal" life and family, I went to college and I am planning on doing a master, however I do not have idea on what. I want to express my admiration to you, you’ve shown a lot of courage and I thank you for sharing your experiences. I totally agree with you on the potential you have and I think you would do great and enjoy the social work field. You are still young, not even 30. If go ahead and study, you will still have at least 20 year of work in you career. In terms of cost you can apply to financial aid, I am pretty sure they will pay if not for everything, at least most of the education. A good tip its to start in a community college which is cheaper and after the "two years" you can transfer to a university. I wish you the best and congrats for you two amazing kids, God bless you!

Wow, I'm amazed your still alive and sane enough to write your story with such passion. You need to remember where you came from and be proud of where your at. Even though you don't feel you have a direction you have a story that would help a lot of youth and adults. The reason you have no job and you quit on the spot like that day is because you have another calling somewhere, sometime.. There is opportunities for those who stand there ground and hold there head up high and really own who they are and stand by it and be proud. I have spent over 7/10 in and out of jail stuck in a cycle of misery, deceit, and selfishness because I had no idea what opportunities where out there. All you need is the desire to share the things that you love or your experience, or a service. Anything can turn into opportunity if your looking. My advice to you and you do sound like you have good communication skills as you need those things to survive on the streets. If you enjoyed hustling back when it was fun turn life into a legal hustle everyone loves bright and fun people expecialy when they have such an amazing story and can be around to share experience and opportunity. Good luck and God Bless

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I'm 19 with two kids, a loving boyfriend, and no direction whatsoever. Money isn't a problem, but my lack of ambition is. I need something to occupy my time. I don't really have any friends. I have no talents, hobbies or interests. I take college classes online, and I don't have a job. I'm extremely depressed, overweight, and just like you, I can't/won't do anything when I don't have any direction. I sleep all day or spend time on the computer playing games, playing with my children, or watching tv. I want to do well and succeed for my children, I just don't know what to do or how to go about doing it. Please help me.

It is good you are taking online classes. That is a good start! Since I do not have kids and I do not know your specific situation my advised may or not work for you. I will suggest you to try to go to attend classes in a school instead of the online classes. You can start as an undecided major with your general requirements and on the way you may find something you enjoy. I do not know where you live, but in the agency I work, they have a day care and it is pretty neat and clean. Since you have time now, you could perhaps go online and do some research on the resources in you area/city. Try to go the board of education and ask what they can offer you for you kids. There is always help, you just have to look for it, and I mean really taking action, making phone calls..etc. Also, if you go to school you can start making friends and interact with people. Wish you the best !

ba<x>sed on all the stories I read here, people need hobbies and creative thinking to make their hobbies to career/jobs and explore potential career either through college, internships, or volunteer. A lot of people need support and motivation ,focus, self discipline& responsibility (to not ruin accomplishments), need independence and money through a okay to good job. A tough skin and Wisdom ( life experience to sail through the storms of life). Perhaps even a change of environment WITHIN REASON. Easy said than done. I analyze things now.<br />
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I'm 20 years old now. I will share my story honestly here because it's easy to share it online than to the people I know. I come from a toxic dysfunctional domestic violence type of home with parents full of problems from depression to hoarding and problems getting a good paying job. I was a strong little kid full of life and ambitions, friends, hobbies and dreams. As I got older I had to deal with home problems and school problems like bullying and worrying about my safety since I went to a dangerous school in the ghetto unfortunately. I was different than everyone and didn't fit in. I worked hard and got good grades and worked through all problems and went to a fashion high school in Manhattan NYC. There I developed so much anxiety and developed depression. My strength wore off. I had to deal with the horrible high school environment with bitchy materialistic fake students and I hated going to school both teachers and students made it a horrible experience. I didn't know if I wanted to go into fashion because of all the bullshit, anxiety and abuse of workers and models and depression that exist in it. I don't want to be in so much corruption. But you should have seen my work I was very talented and I'm used to be good in art. I don't do art or fashion because of my depression and because the school broke my dreams it was such a tough environment for such a unprepared and sensitive fragile broken soul. I have graduated 2 years ago. After graduation I decided not to go to college because 1 it was a bull **** system like the board of ed of NYC, 2 it can very expensive and can run into debt 3 I was unprepared scared and BURN OUT i needed a break and didn't want to mess college up because financial aid will be taken away and paying for school will be much harder to accomplish and 4 the most important of all I felt lost and don't know what to major in. I needed a job badly and had no experience what so ever. My biggest mistake was not applying for a job before graduating high school and not taking advantage of city programs that help youth get job like summer youth all though it's like a lottery not everyone gets a job. I was stuck at home with no friends since I broke my friendship (they were two faced and fake), no money, no experience, no school and my depression was taking over. I was becoming more dead each day that passed and losing myself and my personality just everything that makes who I am . I tried to get help by going to a clinic to get a therapist , they didn't help just take advantage of my medicaid, they gave a paper of a program who help kids out of school get jobs and that program was **** they send me to this ****** telemarketing job which I quit in less than a month, then later I got a temporary job from a teacher I still was in contact with which was a community chef that job was okay but was temporary so I couldn't keep it. Then the ****** job program from before convinced of a job I regret to this day and most of my suicidal thoughts and depression comes from the most . That job was to be a home health aid. Basically a job where you sign with a agency and got to elderly people homes and help them with chores or medicine. It's not a job for young people this job will depress you and make you fear of aging. I'm traumatize I don't want to ever age never to see my body break down in the most shocking way and would LOVE to die young than to see myself be a alive corpse like these people(no offensive for any other adults out there but this is my experience). I'm now messed up way more than when I graduated high school. I hate myself every ******* day. I was very vulnerable alone scared and had no support from NO ONE. I have no direction in life no guidance. I was naive and living in a bubble and this why this happened to me. You can't trust people these days, you can't be naive or stupid. You have to educate yourself as much as you can. You have to be careful and always stay calm and THINK. DON'T LISTEN TO OTHERS ONLY LISTEN TO YOURSELF AND WHAT YOUR HEART WANTS. YOUR HEART TELLS YOU WHAT YOU WANT AND BRAINS SAYS IF IT'S OKAY. The teacher that I stayed in contact told me that caring for people was honorable and a beautiful thing but it's horrible because that's not for everyone and YOU MUST DO ONLY THINGS THAT YOU'RE COMFORTABLE WITH. Like I said I was in a deep depression relapse and I needed money since my parents wouldn't even give my necessities like soap among other things. I wasn't in a good fr<x>ame of mind so this what happened to me . After this horrible episode of my life I finally realized how important school is and why everyone says to go and that's what you're supposed to do and blah blah blah because if you don't you will end up in a ****** job you hate getting a low pay. Even if you majored in something and figured out too late that you don't want to do that you can always change or if your degree at least you have a temporary good paying job that doesn't destroy your self worth and ego. Just saying I'm not judging anyone all I'm trying to say is it's not all bad for you guys you still have options and solutions. I now go to a community college which is okay just full of immature kids in their late teens who haven't experience horrible life lesson **** yet. It's very much like high school. I now have a normal job in retail . I wished I didn't had to learned everything the hard way. I still feel empty dead and lost. I still don't know what to major in after graduating community college since I'm in liberal arts and that only covers the basic. I still have the no direction in life and still deal with my self hatred and depression. I don't know how to move from my horrible experience but being really busy in school and in my new job helps to forget. I hate applying to new jobs because of this ******* job that haunts me, it makes me look bad and I'm so ******* ashamed. I puts this title on me. I can't tell anyone I know because they will judge me and emotionally I'm too vulnerable to handle that. They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger I disagree with that ba<x>sed on everything I lived through what doesn't kill you strengthens and weakens you at the same time. Wish all the best of luck for all of you 20 something and the rest of the world who is struggling with this internal **** we have in common. Stay strong stay smart and educate yourself through books and documentaries, make good friends and analyze and question everything ( I didn't do that before). Get a support system and make the best reasonable and responsible decisions.

wow dude...you are truly awesome. you pretty much summed most of it all. I feel crazy because of all this crap. most of what you said if not all is pretty much dead center correct and im glad I found this because I thought I was the only looney bin thinking this. wish I could talk to ya more because obviously this shet is ridiculous! great advice though and I say that same shet. amen brother keep it real and hit me up guys we gotta all figure dis shet it out
peace
im 19

I'm in a similar situation as well. I'm 22 now, I went to community college when I wasn't feeling it at the time cause I felt forced since I couldn't find a job at the time after I graduated high school. I failed all my classes, killed my gpa, and was on academic probation. Around then I had found a job, a crappy low wage job that I stayed with for two years (I tried doing 1 class for a semester cause that's all I could afford) and I was at a comfortable state where I didn't want to find another job or go to school. I still live with my parents, I just wish I had gone away to school. Now, sitting here at home jobless, with no car, no associate's. My depression has gotten worse where as I've isolated myself from anyone, no friends, haven't left my house for days if not weeks. I've struggled with depression most of my life and its eating me up. I'm trying to find a job and transfer to another community college and fix my mistakes the way I can.