I'm 24 Year Old And Still Confused,goalless,weak,don't Know What To Do With Myself.

I'm 24 year old,lost my job 1.6yrs ago,still don't know what to do with my future.I'm still confused,goalless,disinterested in life,
not confident,weak,dull, lazy,stupid ,irrational,sarcastic,hypocritical,negative speaking,always looking for someone to help me,
Thank you to all of you who shared your opinion/story about your life.Since the day I posted this story (its about two years ago)I have discovered that I NEVER understood LIFE in the right perspective.I was struggling because all the time I REALLY DIDN'T CARE ENOUGH for myself/life and as Napoleon Hill already said:
"If you do not conquer self, you will be conquered by self."
Napoleon Hill
That means either YOU control your MIND or MIND controls YOU.All this time I was NEVER in CONTROL of my MIND/self.In the meanwhile I collected so many Self-help material .At the moment Napoleon Hill's "Think & Grow Rich"  audio book has shown me a way(method) out of my personal crisis and inspired/motivated me to take charge of my life. All the while I wasn't really sure where I'm going or what I'm going to do ,That PARALYZED me mentally and physically.I'm still working on myself and slowly understood that TRUE CONFIDENCE is a LIFE LONG JOURNEY.I'm bound/destined to go through UPS & DOWNS in my life but I NEED NOT FEAR anymore.I need to focus and get close with RIGHT PEOPLE(Those who accept me for who I am and help & support me at the time of need like Family members(if any).........relatives(if any).......Friends..........Well wishers....Good Books(they are the best ) or any other  trustworthy person.....)And in the future also these PEOPLE WILL HELP me  at the time of NEED & will GIVE ME EMOTIONAL & MORAL SUPPORT.

"Don't wait. The time will never be just right."
Napoleon Hill
Its our life and the DECISION of TAKING CHARGE of  our lives PURELY depends on OURSELVES.
“You are the only person on earth who can use your ability.” Zig Ziglar
So when is the RIGHT time to make such decisions?(I got my answer through PERSONAL  EXPERIENCE and taking helpful IDEAS from Self-help and inspirational material.)
I leave this question open to all those people who are struggling with their lives and looking for ways to help themselves.I say FEEL FREE to  DECIDE FOR YOURSELF ( as there are NO RULES/MEASURE TO SAY WHEN A PERSON WILL TAKE DECISION TO BETTER HIS LIFE AND HOW FAR WILL HE/SHE SUCCEED)

“Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude”  Zig Ziglar quotes
My best wishes to all of you for your future!:)

PositiveBeing PositiveBeing 26-30, M 23 Responses Jul 23, 2011

Your Response


I wonder what was the job u lost, may I know

I feel best when I can connect with others and I know I'm not alone in the pain I experience. If you met me you would probably never know, I was popular, a scholarship athlete in college, pretty well liked by women and you would think I have everything going for me. But I have given up at times. I have flaked on my friends so many times because of my depressionI'm surprised I still have as many as I do, I guess I'm blessed. I can't share this with anybody in person but it feels better to find a random connection online and share my experience at least a little bit. I'm 27, prefer to be alone most of the time, hopeless romantic, angry, rebellious, and probably more scared than I'd want to admit to even on here. Iv spent years on the top of the totem pole and do not have much of a wish to get back there unless I can fix my recently fostered intuition that the only way I will survive is without love. And Iv tried to, it's not surviving at all. Life without love is not worth living, and I feel pitiful as I smile through a misleading mask full of "confidence" and "charm" so others don't know how different I am. Maybe they know maybe they don't. I don't even know which I'd prefer. Just reach out and touch someone. Just reading this story inspired me to write this little broken summary of who I am

It seems many people out there go through these same kind of situations ,emotions over and over again.
But mate I MUST tell you that you have a made a GREAT discovery:)

You said:
" I can fix my recently fostered intuition that the only way I will survive is without love. And Iv tried to, it's not surviving at all. Life without love is not worth living, and I feel pitiful as I smile through a misleading mask full of "confidence" and "charm" so others don't know how different I am"

or In terms of a quotations I can put it this way:(I Love quotes by the way ;) )
"Life without love is not worth living"-Batastn85 :)
This is LIFE CHANGING discovery in my opinion and I'm sure if you just apply this thought in your life ,your Life WILL change DRAMATICALLY.
My best wishes for your future. :)

I feel like i'm in a similar situation as many of the people commented on this post. I'm 25 going on 26 soon, and I graduated almost three years ago with a B.S. degree in statistics. I haven't have a full time job since. I have been working on temp jobs and projects, but none of them turn into a full time job. The thing that makes it worse is that my parents are separated and my dad can barely support himself. Same with my mom. Currently, I live with my mom, but really neither one of them can fully support me while I am "trying to figure it out". Hence, I deal with so much anxiety from the pressure. I have student loans to pay off, a little bit of credit card debt, and a car lease. I really want to die sometimes, but I don't think I have it in me to actually do it. I just don't know what do. My resume has so many short term assignments that I feel like no employer will ever hire me.

I can understand this is a REAL TOUGH time for you.Yeah...I know this feeling of being paralyzed,indecision,confusion,hopelessness and worry about future.
I have myself experienced the situation and I slowly came to realize that Life is a hard fact and I needed "Right" knowledge to help myself out of my personal crisis.As a result I discovered that there ARE people who ONCE struggled just like us.But the difference between them and us is the knowledge of "Law of success/principles/ideas"(for those who're looking for success,happiness,material wealth)
I have REALIZED that I had LITTLE or no knowledge of these LIFE MAKING principles.I suggest you reading Napoleon Hill's "Think & Grow Rich"I'm sure it is meant for people who're lost or struggling in their lives hopelessly.
I'm still learning and I know it is going to be a life long process but DEFINITELY it WILL be a worth journey.:)

im 24. i dropped out of college (even though i had a full scholarship as an athlete) and have wandered aimlessly ever since. well who am i kidding, i wandered aimlessly in college too. i come from a pretty well off background where most of my friends are either pursuing more school or finding jobs thru parents etc. i have no problem with work ethic or finding my menial bartending and serving jobs but feel totally disatisfied every day. i have moved around alot which has helped a little. moving always gives you a new perspective on yourself and life... i have figured out i cant be a bartender forever (those 35 year old, single, no care in the world, lifetime bartenders are just sad sad news) and this has given me some much needed motivation to get back in school again and move home. but im terrified i will get discouraged again and feel restless and left behind and quit. i guess i just see all these people my age around me... they seem to be moving forward. even if they arent in love with their careers they still seem to be faking it and living life and making money and moving forward. i feel like im moving in circles. i hope moving home gives me one last jolt that will push me thru school but then what. im sure ill be rt back where i am now. hating my job, discouraged and isolated from my friends, dissapointing my family and self, gaining even more weight, pathetic. ugh

yeah!your words:"i have moved around alot which has helped a little. moving always gives you a new perspective on yourself and life... i have figured out i cant be a bartender forever (those 35 year old, single, no care in the world, lifetime bartenders are just sad sad news) and this has given me some much needed motivation to get back in school again and move home."
make perfect sense to me.This "change" in your life is NECESSARY to make any difference in your otherwise aimless and hopeless life.You are on the right path toward improving your life,just keep faith in yourself and keep going.Good luck!:)

I'm 24 years old getting ready to turn 25 in March. I have no vision of the all. Dropped out of college, hold on my account so I CAN'T get my transcript even if i wanted to continue where I left off. Lost my car. Started smoking and drinking. Lost my good "young" look somewhat. No Job as of now. My girlfriends leave me. I don't know what to do.

I believe we all have a long story which point towards frustration and stress.
About me I kept accepting career as it came. Did my engineering(with extra one year, due to one supplementry exam) worked in a call center so called tech support executive job which motivated me to add up further degree and I went on to pursue my MBA(from a tier 2 b-school). It gave me a good placement but i left it after 3.5 months to join one financial services KPO. Ghosh, i could survive working in a back end job only for 11 months & later made an exit from there too. Thereon my career interest took a new turn and i felt passionate to pursue PhD and join academics. I joined one university to pursue PhD and got an offer from the same to teach finance alongwith. This was one of those best moments of my life which are really countable since i moved from my teens. My excitement and passion earned me a good respect among students and faculty, but the most important part of pursuing a PhD is lost somewhere between. I have completed 6 months with this university and now i feel totally exhausted, demotivated, lazy to pursue the same kind of work everyday. I am poor in being assertive & this has done harm to me many times.
Often I am loaded with non teaching activities like preparing student database, calling students for admission, faculty politics and a blind race to showcase oneself as the best among all (i everything except academics). I am pursuing PhD in finance and there is not eve a single person here who is PhD in management or Finance to guide me up. I am feeling damn pissed off that after repeated mistakes of my life still i ended up in the dirtiest dungeon. I am 27 now and seriously confused what am i going to do further. If i continue obviously they will give me a PhD degree but with this kind of environment i can't add up or sustain motivation, skills, knowledge which will definitely be in question after completion of this program.
During my MBA i met a girl and we fell in love with each other. The reason i moved from my first job to a KPO is to be in the same office with her. This didn't happen as she was working in night shift and i worked during. She worked there only for 8 months and later moved to her home state. Its been one long year since we have seen each other. Of course, we do talk on phone but long distance communication sucks! We love each other but things are not working the way i had planned. For her its quite easy as she doesn't do much of planning. I do have some problem at home. My elder sis, who is married has got a lill psychiatric problem and is staying with my parents. It does bothers me a lot.
I had many ambitions, passions and dreams. But now it sounds like an idea of past. Sometimes i wonder standing in the front of mirror, is it me? I have no thoughts left, nothing motivates me much. Seems i have to accept life like this and live it more as a burden.
Any advices?

I totally feel for you. I am currently on a PhD program... But somehow, I don't know anymore why I am even doing this...

Hi every one I want ti tell you I was the same of you after all I changed I made a list of goals and I worked toward them I started from small steps one apple a day or 5 minute walk, think something positive and stopped watching TV specially news and started read books which help you left up you can start from making a list of what you don't like about your self and what you like about your self then trough away the list what you not like about your self and keep the one you like and read it every day in the morning and before go to bed and never stop reading books about successful people believe me it worked for me now I have a beautiful family and kids to die for and living my dream life and do care about you to!

WOW....that's an amazing story.....Thanks for the Reply :)

IM ACTUALLY LIKE YOU GUYS ASWELL. SAME BOAT .. I THINK WE ALL ARE , BECAUSE WE ARE ON THE SAME PAGE WRITING THE SAME STORY.. i work but i am a gambler . cant help it .. its sunday night . im depressed badly because ive just lost so much money .. so angry with myself.. i still dont know what to do in my life. im a car detailer im not happy where i am working . at the end of the week paying rent , fuel, living costs, i really cant save money .. so i fall into a depression .. in my account at the moment i got 25 dollars.. dont even know how im going to survive threw the week.

Yep..........I guess the BOAT is getting CROWDED haha :P Well.....Well.....It seems to happen with everyone............I think this is a learning curve for all of us.......This is the time for introspection and look within our own hearts for the discover our true purpose in our best wishes for your future...........Believe in yourself and Try to figure out a way to help yourself.........................

Yeah im 24 and i feel like i missed my chance to be great. i cant really find a reason to get up anymore. everyday is exactly the same..... yeah yeah yeah nin but seriously the days just bleed together and cant tell a few days from a few weeks. i dont know what i wanna do or what i should be doing to accomplish it .... im at such a loss. feel like it dosent matter anyway

Hmm.........yup........I can understand........the feeling of confusion and know its really strange truth that ONLY at the time of challenging situations we discover our strengths.........Well.....I truly wish you find a way to solve your personal crisis..........Goodluck...........

Well, I am a very similar situation, with maybe a tiny difference, and that is having accepted my limits and trying to set more reasonable, attainable goals.<br />
I think the source of a lot of young people's depression and confusion(our generations, those born in the laste 80s, early 90s) is growing up with too much TV influence, and later, internet. I really think it has led to this blaze, detached from reality attitude about life.<br />
You watch TV and get the impression that you only matter if you do something so crazy, flashy and outrageous that everybody will stop to look at you, which is crap.<br />
We have no real values anymore. Family and romance have gone out the window, to be replaced by "cooler" goals, like sleeping with as many as you can and trying every drug and fast motorbike out there until you break your head. You get told that's what "living" really is. <br />
BS. <br />
I used to be very undisciplined-and still am, to a large extent-but right now, my main goal is to work for everything I get. I know getting things the easy way will bring me more pleasure, but sweating for every little thing you have is the only way you can get SATISFACTION.

So, concrete terms, I started college at 18, when I was severely depressed and really shouldn't have taken up any long-term commitment. Back then I just did it because it was what everybody else did, and I really had little idea of what I wanted to do with my life.
In fact, if you would've asked me back then, I would've said I just want to die. I was just totally drained, emotionally, and in every way.
So I got into college and dragged on from year to year, spending most of my time just sleeping, and being isolated, with no friends. I even had to repeat my senior year, because I still had 5 more exams to pass. I did finally graduate last year, in July. A 3 year college programme with a degree in economics focused on environmental issues. I then spend 8 months looking for a job in just about any field, and couldn't get anything .
I finally got one in May, making sandwiches and other stuff in a hypermarket. A very tiresome, poorly-paid job of being 8 to 10 hours on your feet each day, starting at 6 am, and usually with no break at all.
That was the turning point for me, really. I realized that unless I took some risks, some action, I'd probably still be on the same job 5 years from now, or more. So I decided to try getting into Uni, again. This time a field that was more suitable for me- a technical field. I asked my parents for support, though, because I cannot work and study at the same time, not with this degree. That was the hardest thing, really, since they've supported me a lot, already.
But, anyway, this is a chance to actually get some real training. In a concrete field.
So I took the exam, last Tuesday, and got in. After studying like 2,3 hours per day for 6 weeks. And well, from now on..I'll see.

Hey, I'm 32. I'm in the same boat. I have an engineering degree and I'm in law school. Had a house...lost it. Had a job...lost it too. Had a girlfriend...lost her...but for some reason I just haven't jumped off a bridge yet. Keep the faith. Cheerio!

oh........That really sucks....!Hope things get better for you in future!:)

I really know how you feel, what you described basically sums me up well except for like three or four things. Im 21, graduated from college last year and have NOT been able to secure a job at all, not only that but the area I studied seems so far out of reach making a job difficult to land. I love animals so I did a course on that, but now I dont know WHAT the hell to do as it's not working out. <br />
<br />
So basically im 21, jobless and living with my parents. Not only that im probably the least motivated person around. I dont even know where to begin to understand what I want to do with my life.

Well.........I have heard many times......that all the answers are in within the heart........It seems true to me....because as I'm looking for more opportunities.......and eventually finding them........By the end of the day........its MAKING A CHOICE(from available options /opportunities at hand) &amp; STICK TO IT &amp; WORKHARD!Hmm...I'm on my way in building up my career!Good luck to you:)

wow! i'm surprised that I'm not the only 24year old person here who's completely lost. I'm goaless, and I wake up just to see the next day. I have tried the army it didn't work out, I have tried going back to school fail, I have tried working full time, but there are no jobs out there. I'm very discouraged. <br />
My boyfriend said that if I don't figure out my life that his going to break up with me bc he can't be with someone who has no idea about what they want in life. I don't blame him. I really don't know what I need to do, or where to begin. I guess I need advice. Please

Well...there are people going through this quarter life crisis....but I slowly realized that all the answers are within ourselves...We gotta spent sometime to reflect on our past know our strengths ...........and then looking for current opportunities......and then focus on building up our career through proper planning and preparation!:)

Stop worrying about the future and what you should or shouldn’t do and try living in the present for a start. Enjoy life! Do something you like. It’s not necessary to give you profit. And a job is just that – a job, something to bring food to the table. If you don’t have any particular interests there’s no point trying to develop some now.<br />
Or you could try some of those carrier tests to give you a clue as to what you might be good at and enjoy doing. Only you know what you want to do with your life.

Thanks for commenting!I'm on my way in building up my career!:)

Same problem. I'm 24, quite bright, motivated, lots of career opportunities are available to me because despite the GFC Australia is booming but property prices have never been higher, degrees are a dime a dozen and you can easily earn 150k+ with a trades certificate. Do I get a degree and slug it in the corporate world or in a more enjoyable job earning just enough to get by or I could work hard in a miserable job not contributing to anything of any real value to the world besides helping the economy and making the government money and I would be rewarded for this with a good wage. Unless youre passion just happens to be something that happen to be a decent paying job then you're stuck which quite a conundrum. I like the comment said before me about following you're passion, but what I'd you don't have a passion? <br /><br />
I like to think of it this way... If happiness was the currency and the happier you were when doing a better job or being successful at you're job the more currency you receive, what job do you think you would earn the most in? You can use this to find a happy medium of wage/survival and happiness/ Forfillmentt.<br /><br />
Does anyone have any ideas of work they have considered or what're more information on?

Well said!I agree with you!Thank you for your comments!I'm now working on my career!:)

Thanks God you are normal and in good company!<br />
Most feel like that at this age! <br />
All will come to past.<br />
You will look back and consider this period best time of your life.<br />
When you are 75+! Lol<br />
As you are so was I !. As I am so shall you be!<br />
So enjoy you time with no risk of all risk!

haha :P Thanks for commenting!:)

Some call me negative nancy some call me a critical (often to philosophical) thinker...but there is those lines again, "all will come to pass" does it pass or do you simply stop fighting and settle? "You will look back and consider this period best time of your life" will you look at it because that's what society told you was the best years or simply because you were ignorant and didn't know any better? "Most feel like that at this age!" if everyone feels like this what happens that makes it suddenly stop? Is there a time period where it turns off? I've heard it's around 30. But does it turn off or do you give in to our society and simply settle and become content with mediocrity? Because mediocrity keeps the bills paid... ***What's ultimately frustrating is that our generation for the first time in american history will not do better as a whole than our parents. It is statistically proven at the rate of education inflation economy so forth...and it royally sucks. When you were told from birth that this peice of paper and a good 4-5 years worth of hard work would without a shadow of a doubt be your ultimate key to success you believed it. Then when you realize that although it's not completely false but it's not that true anymore either, what do you do? This was not a problem 20 30 years ago in this country. We are the first to battle it. I am 25 years old. If I have 50k in student loans and get a 4 year degree, I'll come out making 30 MAYBE 40 a year I'll have a small mortgage payment for 8 to 10 years for student loans and Ill be 30 when all this starts. I will be 40 by the time it's paid off and statistically speaking making about 60 plus at that time. My 40s will be good but you have to start getting prepared in the 50s. For retirement. We will especially because social security will be non existent by that time. And all the while were doing a job that we h a t e. with a passion... Because our real passion(s) won't pay the bills... So what's the point?... Am I just being negative, or do people tag it with being negative because they can't tell me it's false? The ultimate argument is that no other generation has been in this situation with these variables. So "you'll figure it out" is not an acceptable answer.

I'm in a similar situation. With only a handful of credits. No full degree. I bombed out of a prestigious art school and attempted community college twice. I'm 25 soon to be 26 and I'm completely blank. But what's frustrating is that for so many years I wasn't. I had it down like a science. Interior design/architectural history, my own firm, a retail location to develop into multiple locations, etc etc. I knew where when what who and why. I got to that prestigious art school and realized my country *** didn't have a shot in hell, on a good day. Since then I am b l a n k ... That was 5years ago. Moved back home tail between my legs and here I sit. And this bs message I/we are fed that "you'll figure it out no one can tell you, you have to open the door" I'm so sick of that easy cop out. Can we come up with a better lie than this? I guess I'm bitter (yes I'll admit it) because I/we were told by our previous generations "go to college and life will be so much better," they didn't lie but they didn't anticipate our reality now either. A college degree is a dime a dozen now and with luck you can start off making just above minimum wage in a job you hate. Unless you dump 100k into a full masters and maintain a flawless record and gpa. Then you can make a little more but you will just have to dump it back into your "educational mortgage payment" not to mention it takes 4 to 6 years of your life. We are in "quarter life crisis" because we were lied to, we have to pick what will pay the bills over what we love, not as a job but as our education. Forced into boring lifeless positions to live for the weekend. So we can enjoy 48hrs of life. All the while cutting a check every month to pay back uncle Sam (plus interest) for this "experience" we received. 20 years ago a bachelors degree was worth a lot more and cost a hell of a lot less. So of course we were told to do it. Just like everyone was told to buy houses and flipem for profit in 2006... Guess what it caught up with us. Now what?

Thanks for commenting.That's a long story...........Phew.........This quarter life crisis seem to exist everywhere........Yup it is very this phase.......but there is also some good in it............we try to do different things and discover our hidden strengths.......!Well Hope we discover our life goal becomes sooner.............!;)

Yeah I understand. I have tried the army, going back to school, and study who-know's-what. I'm very discouraged. And my boyfriend said if I don't figure out what I want in life he has to dumb me bc he doesn't want someone who has no goals, no future. Idk. I'm now seriously considering the army to see where that would take me.

u will be raped for sure in army

What really helped me, when I was in a similiar situation, I began to make short term goals, easily attainable ones, as I accomplished them, I began to become more confident. As time went on, I make long term goals too. Good luck.

Thank you!Yup!'m doing that now! =)

Might be you need to take one step at a time...figure out what is your present goal..try to learn how you can implement it...see different options which are feasible...explore and understand what suits you best and move forward to accomplish that...<br />
I know not as simple as I said...hopefully you can get some better picture...

thanks :)

I too feel the same way. Im 24. Ambitious. Driven. Motivated. Smart. I have the desire and ability to learn. I just dont know where to put my energy.

hi ronnie!Don't worry!You'll definitely find your way!The answer has always been within us ,need little patience and trust in ourselves!

The comments have pretty much already said most of what I had in mind to say but I'm going to say it anyway. What has helped me through my own quarterlife crisis is coming to the realization that I need to listen to my heart. Again, I need to listen to MY heart and NO ONE ELSE'S. I have only recently gotten better at being able to distinguish my voice from the voices of everyone else telling me what I should do with my life, guilting me and pressuring me and expecting me to go down a prescribe path. I have come to realize that it is not healthy doing what others want you to do. Life is short and you need to do what is right for you. My recommendation is to try as hard as you can to get back in touch with yourself. I have been through years of what you are going through - being listless, goal-less, without any sort of direction. I'm still pretty much figuring things out but I have a vague idea now of where my heart is telling me to go with my life and SURPRISE! It's not where anyone has ever told me to go. A book that has helped me a lot lately is "20 Something Manifesto" by christine hassler. Everyone is an individual and it may not trip yer trigger but maybe it you might get some good out of it. I wish you the best of luck in navigating this difficult time in life!

Thank you saurora6 for the kind words :)

You've said it yourself:<br />
"Looking for someone to help me"<br />
<br />
If you're waiting for someone to drag you out of this confusion then you're wrong. It's you and you alone that can help yourself. <br />
Someone can share you all the wisdom and all the steps to find the purpose of your life, but remember that they can only show you the door. Eventuallt it's you who decide to walk through it. And you alone.<br />
<br />
The good thing is that you're willing to change, you've come to realise this and you want to make your life more meaningful, but keep in mind that's you who sets the game for your own life.<br />
<br />
Anyway, <br />
what helped me with finding my purpose is to read some books, watch movies, reflect and reflect. I'd definitely recommend "Man's Search for Meaning" by Victor Frankl. <br />
<br />
And finally, you're NOT old, weak, stupid. If you believe that's the case than that will be the case. If you believe you can be strong and smart than you can be.

That's a question only you can answer. Don't stop questioning yourself, it may be your way out.

I don't really know what to do with my future either. I know what I'm interested in and am hoping to be able to make money off of it, but I don't have a clue where to begin. There has to be something you enjoy doing that you could make money while doing.

Thank you for the reply!I'm really confused and not able to figure out what i want in my life.Is there any way to find out what i really want?