Everything I would like to do is not "real", as in the sense that it all really just does not happen in this world. Not saying that it is totally fantasy based, those things all could happen, all are very possible but they just don't happen here, this world is set up in a pathetic little slave factory forced society. So much so that I find it rare to find anyone who has not lost the part of the imagination that can truly touch the outside, the real outside, and come back to see how small the inside always was. There is nothing here for me. I pretty much hate or am very bored with that which most people seem to lust after or seek and enjoy. The only thing I even know how to do is "art" stuff, but I don't really take any joy from it, it just feels like very unrewarding work, I continue doing it mostly because of that deep thing down inside me that started me doing it in the first place, that I assume starts everyone who does it in the first place, I have little choice, obey it or go stark raving mad. (If you have one of whatever you want to call it, you probably know what I mean). So not really given the choice to seek things I truly would desire, since in this current world there are no choices along those particular lines, and the only thing I can do in this world is looked over, rejected, uncontrolled, unrewarding, and takes more money then it makes. I'm pretty much clueless on what I am suppose to do with this life.