Fake And Empty.

I have a friend in real life, he's nice. But, I know that eventually, we'll become just familiar faces...

The people on here are nice too.. But I've only found once in paticular who seemed... hmm... relatable. It's just, our friendship is limited. He is busy, and I understand. I suppose, although I make it seem that I'm fine and okay, I'm really... empty... Like, I don't want to be a burden.

I have nothing to do at home.. Nothing to eat, mother hassling me over how I'm different from the others.. Sisters constantly arguing. The noise... Oh, the noise is too much.

I feel.. choked. I dunno, I feel numb.. I don't try to block out thoughts too much.. They just come, whether friendly, whether hostile, they come. I have no life... I lie about everything... I do nothing but sleep.. Broken sleep... School isn't too beautiful... This town isn't my own.. I can't go anywhere. I'm chained... Numb.. Cold... I feel fake and lousy.

Though, I complain not. I'm just holding onto a thin thread of hope that it all may change. My need to be alone isn't satisfied. I need to be alone alone. I need to be able to be me without everyone afraid... I don't want to be in a room of people yet still have such creeping disconnections anymore.

I dunno. Enjoy.
JeuneCirque JeuneCirque
18-21, F
1 Response Dec 2, 2012

keep your friend, he'll come in handy when u need someone to talk to