Genuinely Nice Guy

First off, any one who comes out and claims to be a nice guy is generally going to be a not-very-nice guy trying to create the impression of being a nice guy, so I'll have to apologise for that, but hear me out if you will...

As a small child (like so many of my stories begin!) I was endlessly horrified at the readiness of other children to be mean and spiteful. I was always the kid who would step back and let people have their turn, but instead of finding other people to be similarly motivated - and this is as true in the adult world as it was in the child's - a majority of people seem intent to fight and be aggressive purely to meet their own needs. People are selfish, cruel, intollerant, and in far too many cases there is simply no reason for it.

I've had to learn the hard way, the very hard way, that people who don't have a nasty bone will be taken advantage of by those who do have one, or often more than one. Now I'm not a Jesus person at all, but a lot of quotes rightly-or-wrongly ascribed to him make a lot of sense to me, even though they sometimes seem ludicrous on the surface. Like, the idea that if a man should strike you on the cheek, that you should turn to him also the other cheek. I could give various explanations of this, but no words are quite able to properly express it. I know in my heart that this is correct, and this is the way I live my life. I have paid heavily for it, and lost a great deal both materially and otherwise, but a person who does wrong to another can only do so for so long, before their wickedness turns them about and makes them good again. By turning the other cheek, I brought my opressor closer to their own inevitable goodness.
davidstone78 davidstone78
26-30, M
3 Responses Jul 30, 2007

Wow, 3 comments on the same day!<br />
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Celainn, there is no better, only different. I am just just one extreme of which there are other extremes, and no extreme is ever really good - and in this context I mean good for personal prosperity, not as in good and evil.<br />
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AbbyNormal, perhaps I gave you the wrong impression. I don't consider it to be an inability. There are positive things about being this way, but I also concede there are negatives too. Likewise as Maintainman suggests, there are positives and negatives to being more aggressive also. Being aggressive or peaceful... in truth, neither is better than the other. The only 'better' is the person who knows how and when to use both aggression and gentleness, but sadly people are generally one way or the other.<br />
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Maintainman, I certainly agree with you that not everyone will 'eventually come to goodness'. A certain percentage of people are just plain bad, and that's the way it is. That's the way it has to be. I disagree with you on cloistering the good and the innocent - that would be like leaving your chess pieces in place for fear of them getting taken. We're here to play the game of life, and for a game to be worthwhile it has to be possible for you to lose as much as it is for you to win.<br />
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I hope this clarifies for each of you who commented that this entry was not intended to be a proclamation of superiority in any form, I'm not saying I'm better because I'm good and not bad. People who will "joyfully kick the living crap out of anyone who [they] see abusing a kid or animal" are absolutely essential to life. As are good people, as are bad people.

There is the way I would like for life to be and the harsh reality of it. I can empathize with the early discovery of illogical violence and evil.<br />
However the concept that everone will eventually come full circle to Goodness is not valid and if ya think it is I am filled with sorrow at the hard times that lay ahead of ya! I hate Bullies and cruel folks especially those who prey on the innocent and animals. But pacifistic , sorry it just isn't me. <br />
I will joyfully kick the living crap out of anyone who I see abusing a kid or animal without reservation. <br />
I fugure if they chose that particular moment in time to be that way. Somebody choose the same place in time for me to share it with them.<br />
I respect no holds barred pacifists as strange as it may sound . But in general they need ta be cloistered . Sic religion etc. For their own good.<br />
Good Luck ya are gonna need it.<br />
Dx

David,<br />
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I can relate entirely although I wish I couldn't. I've never been able to deliver spite with a believable or effective punch. I can't hold a grudge to save my life. Revenge is a dirty word to me and even when I did try in my past - I failed miserably. Such a waste of time and energy... My level of anger with people is generally MUCH lower than others are capable of and my level of tolerance is usually much higher ...<br />
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I don't understand. Despite all efforts to be like the rest of the world just for the purpose of self preservation and protection ... I fail miserably in all this business.<br />
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Have you learned anything from it, found anything wonderfully positive about this 'inability' or just come to terms with it?