I was diagnosed with OCD last year because of my intrusive thoughts. It didn't make sense to me because I don't have rituals, like everyone else with OCD in my family. I've always had anxiety and thought maybe my thoughts just spiraled with my anxiety. Until I reluctantly tried to add OCD as an experience. I didn't want to call it OCD because it was all in my head and I didn't have any behaviors. My grandmother is a counter, my mother an obsessive cleaner, and my grandfather was an excessive handwasher. It was obvious in them, but not me. When I saw Pure O and looked it up, I immediately got teary.

I've had medical issues and since I didn't have insurance until recently, I've spent time researching symptoms to determine if it really was serious enough to spend what little money I have on a doctor. I guess I came to the conclusion that I needed the majority of presenting symptoms to consider it a possibility. I didn't see that with OCD. I had one symptom and it was in my head. It could just be an over active imagination.

Knowing there's a term out there means there are more people like me out there. It's like three hundred pounds lifted off of my shoulders at once. I'm not alone.
gatsbygirl88 gatsbygirl88
26-30, F
1 Response Aug 21, 2014

I also cried when I read the description of Pure O OCD. My third therapist, the one who helped me through, did so by telling me that my fears were obsessive thoughts, and that they were not real. That helped, but she never specifically told me it was a form of OCD. Perhaps she thought the name didn't really matter, but to me it really does, because it means I'm not the only one having these thoughts. I was so relieved when I realized I was not the only one, and like you I never considered that it could be OCD because unlike my sisters (one pulls out her eyebrows and eyelashes, the other has intense misophonia) I had never made it outwardly apparent. All I can say it is that going through it is the most nightmarish thing I could ever imagine, and I'm glad I'm not alone.