Rock Bottom Has Arrived....

I am 26 years old, mother of 1 amazing 5 year old boy. I split from his father almost a year ago which was the best thing for me. I have a great job but I am extremley depressed. My ex is currently engaged to someone that he cheated on me with and now having another baby. I provide everything for my son as well as my ex's parents. We were together for 6 years and all 6 years I lived with him so adjusting to life without him has not been easy. I have dated other people but my situation with him just gets worse since he is now devoted to someone else. He put me through A LOT in 6 years, things that noone should have to go through. Being with him I developed a drinking problem. I dont drink every single day but a few times a week and when I do, I drink A LOT. I have made some really awful descions when it comes to drinking like driving. I try and cover my pain with drinking but it only causes me more problems. I am at the lowest point I have ever been before. I lost my mom when i was 15 years old and did find peace with that. I have been on a good path of positvity. Turning to good support and my faith. I am a good person, with a huge heart. I am afraid that I will forever be alone. I dont want to be alone, or feel unwanted. There are many things going on in my life that have lead me to be at where I am now. Problems with money, problems with my car that i cant fix because I dont have the money to right now. I pay bills, put a roof over my sons head and take care of him mainly. I want to just be happy and move on in life, and its really hard sometimes to do that and keep moving forward. I have done it but to keep it consistant is the hard part. If anyone has any advise about how to move foward from all this negativity to do better for my son and I, I would really appricaite it. My first plan of attack is to quit drinking, I have to. It only makes my depression worse. I have a great family that is there for me but I just feel as if I am lost and putting back the pieces is really hard.
An Ep User An EP User
Jan 8, 2013