Its Official

So this morning I woke up and was still in all of my clothes from going out the night before. I open my window and see that I wrecked my car. I was driving drunk. I remember vividly hitting a pole but thought it was a dream. I am drinking all the time since me and my wife split up (she cheated on me). I can't pay all the bills by myself. I have 3 kids by two different women. I have a really good job but after two child supports I am left with nothing. I am crying all the time. I put on a great a "happy" face. But no one knows how much I am hurting. The last two months I barely work. My Boss is letting me get away with it because he knows that I was going through a breakup but he wont let it slide that much more. I hate feeling sorry for myself. I can't see the bright side of anything. I can't even sleep. I take sleeping pills and only then I can sleep for maybe 3 hours. I wake up panicking. And I really don't have a "best friend" I am pretty pathetic.
An Ep User An EP User
3 Responses Jan 12, 2013

You gotta get in recovery bud. Quick. Your on a path of destruction. I can speak to this because I was there. My girl left and ripped my heart out. She was everything to me. And I let that sadness take over everything. A year later, I was able to let it go and start my full recovery. I am now 5 years sober and doing much much better without her or the substances. You are not pathetic. You can do this.

Try Emotional Anonymous. Best Regards and Best of Luck

Hello...i am so sorry for how you feel...i feel exactly the same...panicking when i wake up because things are so bad...of course youve got to stop drinking and driving! things will only get worse if you dont...make that decision today...all other things...i think.. will have to be taken care of one step at a time...im going to start doing things that are good for me....meditation...hiking for exercise...reading...going to church....and putting faith in a higher power to love me and make good things happen when i thought there was no way...i pray you and i both find our way....good luck to you...