I Have Ocd :(

My story starts in july 2010. I started feeling pain in my left knee i just thought maybe it was from pushing a double stroller all day. A couple days went by and my knee was still sore. So i went to my home doctor to let him know that my knee flet werid thats something was wrong. My doctoor then told me that i should ice my knee and keep it elevate. So i did that for a couple of days then i went back and told him it isnt working and i want xrays of my knee because it was swollen and the mucsle was gone. When the xrays came back it showed a lose bone so my doctor sent me to a surgant. So i had an appantment at the hospital where the doctor then told me i had torn the meniscus in my left knee so in oct of 2010 i had surgery to fix it the surgery went well and everything was fine.A couple months after that my doctor sent me for an mri and the mri came back and it said i might have lose bodies. my doctor then wanted me to have surgery and i was a little scared " lose bodies what the hell is that" she gave me a day in feb 2012 but i was so scared i held it off till the end of aug. In between that time every time i bend down i would feel the lose bone floating around inside my knee and i couldn't bend down. Which was hard i have a 3 years old who always wants to play. I never felt alot of pain. In between feb and aug i wen for another mri so that my doctor could be sure . After we got the results back my doctor then had told me not worry that this surgery would be fast and i would be up running around with my child. So i went into the OR and had surgery when i woke up my doctor came in and had told me i would have to use crutches for 4 weeks i was so mad. Then the doctor explane to my grandma that the blood flow wasnt flowing inside my knee which we didnt understand. She gave us pictures of the inside of my knee where she removed a piece of bone that was 2cm by 2cm and that she put all these holes inside my knee so that the blood would flow and the reason for the crutches so i could heal. Well she cut me in 3 places on my knee cap so 10 days latter i had to get my stitches out. Well i was there my doctor came in the room to talk about my surgery she then told me i had osteochonndritis dissecans she couldnt even say it that she told me baicis the bone died becuse it didnt have proper blood flow :s and then she wrote it down for me and told me to google it. well its been 3 almost 4 weeks since i had surgery and in a couple days i go back to the hospital for a check up plus im getting both my knees xray to make sure the left knee is healing well and the right one dont have the same thing. im not going to lie i think no doctor shouuld tell someone to google anything because every person is different and some of the stories i read are scarey and made me cry thinking that it could haappen to me. ive cried because im scared i couuld get it in my other joint and i dont wanna have surgery again. the funny thing is i havent played any sports since i was 12 and i remember having growing pains when i was younger but so did my dad. so where did this come from how did i get it because im a big baby and i wouldnt play anything that would hurt me :s
audalean audalean
22-25, F
1 Response Sep 17, 2012

I feel for you. I have OCD as well as arthritis. I've had it for about 6 years. I had surgery 5 years ago and it never healed, in fact it never will, like it won't for most people at my age. But let me tell you something, not being able to run and jump means nothing after a while. You can still be active, I ride a road bike, swim and lift weights all at high intensities. I got into body building, got really fit practically ripped. Point being, I have now lived a life were people who don't know me, don't know I have a knee injury or anything wrong with me. Only when I'm wearing my unloader brace when I workout do they no I'm hurt. You have to strengthen your legs! its the only way your knee will ever stop hurting I don't care how many surgeries you get. Push through your pain doing low to non weight baring exercises. Your knee will slowly feel better. I go days with no pain sometimes, I have one of the biggest lesions my doctors have ever seen and I have seen plenty. You can live a normal life if you choose to its up to you.