Agoraphobia, Among Others.

I have always been a rather nervous person, since I was very young.  It's been a long, hard road for me.  My life has never been normal, relaxed and carefree.  I am ALWAYS worried about something.

No, it doesn't help for you to tell me to "relax" or "chill out" because it doesn't work that way.  Trust me, if it did, I'd be the happiest person alive. 

I am happy to say that it has been getting so much better with my love in my life, who has helped tremendously.  But now I've got one more irrational fear, losing him.  Which he has assured me is completely impossible.  But with panic and anxiety issues, nothing is impossible.

urbrandofheroin urbrandofheroin
22-25, F
5 Responses Mar 7, 2009

I've learned that depression is the outer edge of sadness and anxiety and worry the outer edge of fear or a response to past or present traumatic experience.

I see what you mean. But you have made progress. Sometimes, we get stuck in the fear of fear.

Thank you serenityseeker.<br />
<br />
Pansies, I know what you mean about feeling like you're right back where you started. When I don't leave my house for over a week I begin to panic that agoraphobia is going to get like it was a year ago. Then, the next time I go out someplace I stay so nervous and spend the entire time fighting off a panic attack, rather than enjoying it.

What you have written is very familiar to me. I'm sorry to read about it. Being loved will help. If it's any consolation, my panic attacks are rare these days. But they can sneak up on you and you think you are back where you started. Like you I am always worried about something. It's not a good way to live. I think it has its roots in our childhood. It sounds like you are recovering. Well done!

I can understand what you mean....I, too, have anxiety....its' a recent addition to the depression I have suffered most of my life...it hit suddenly a few years ago, and I thought I was dying for sure...it's strange to have one disease that makes you want to die and another that makes you afraid you're going to....anyway...you are not alone...and you can do things to help yourself "relax" and "chill"....different things work for different people....music, writing, exercise, medication, tea, comedy, positive affirmations...i wish you the best on your journey....peace...SS