Hate Each Other? That's a Nice Way of Putting It.
My parents divorced in 1995, and split in 1996/(or)7 (pardon my lack of factual certainty, but my memories of my early life are sparse). Judging by the stories they tell, their relationship was an abusive nightmare long before we children came into the picture. Either that, or they are lying; there's no way of telling. I would hope that there were some happy moments, given that they decided to marry and have two children, but I've never heard of the good times between them, and don't remember any. Some screwed up things happened, though, because some of the details in their stories match, such as the one of my dad breaking his hand in a fight with her. In any event, it ended badly; I remember my dad's face bleeding from where my mother had clawed him the day he left.
They do hate each other. My mother openly admits that she tried to kill my dad, and my dad told me that he thought about, and should have killed her. Mother refers to him as "your father", as in "I am going to kill your f***ing father." (If I had a dollar for every time I heard that one...). My father can't even do that, he usually refers to my mom as "that woman", "that *****", or "that crazy *****", depending on how pissed off he is at her. They used to communicate (i.e. scream at each other, until one of them gave up and gave me the phone to take the heat) over the telephone, but now they only communicate (i.e. argue) over email and lawyer's letters, thank heavens. It's been four years since they were in the same room together that wasn't a courtroom. Speaking of court, they've been to court 3 or 4 (I've lost count) times in the last three years. They're going again this fall; mother is trying to have my father thrown in jail for unilaterally reducing his child support payments (he lost his job, and then took a 40% pay cut). That's another issue I've gotten yelled at about until I'm blue in the face, but I digress. The ironic thing is that they spend more money on court costs and lawyer's fees than they are fighting about. As far as jabs go, there's no subtlety about it with my parents. All I ever hear about my father from my mother is about he is an alcoholic, and beat her constantly while they were together. The fun part was when my mother then said that I would wind up just like him; how nice of her. My father usually doesn't have much to say aside from how mother is a "crazy *****". My parents both tell me that I should cut off contact with the other parent, and when I don't, they get mad at me. My mother told me that I was "too forgiving" towards my father. My father was less kind, saying that I was, in essence, a "spineless *****" for putting up with my mother.
The latest bit of fun has been, now that my sister and I are both neearly grown up (I'm 18, and moved out when I was 15, and my sister is 17), my parents accusing each other of abusing us while we were children. This has been dangerous as hell from my perspective, because my mother has a habit of getting extremely pissed off about those kind of allegations, and has bitten our heads off (i.e. screamed at us for hours until we could scarcely stand, because we had been standing at the same place so long) many times over lesser allegations.
Luckily, we are both grown, and I've been moved out, so it's not so bad anymore. They still argue like mad, but I can, for the most part, ignore them. My sister, however, has cut off all contact with our father.