Am I Fooling Myself?

My husband and I go to counseling every other week because we had communication issues. A few months ago, we were discussing an argument and my husband says,"I know you were just being a ***** because you were pms-ing". The comment was like a ball rolling down a hill and at the bottom is PMDD.

We figured out that most of the time, I'm great. Able to handle our boys, 3 1/2 and 2 years old. Able to blow off normal relationship problems. Able to not be a raving b***h.And then comes a week or two before my period...I snap at the kids for the tiniest things, I get so angry over the weirdest things. I am moody and hard to be around. I feel sorry for my kids and loving husband. IMy self-worth goes down the toilet. I tell myself that no one cares about me or loves me. I can't sleep at night because I obsess about friends and husband and wonder why they like me. I can't stand being so pathetic! Then, like a fog lifting, I get my period and within a few days, my symptoms are gone and I'm back to my normal, happy self.

The problem is that I have spent my whole life beliving in the power of positive thinking and living. I am healthy, work out 4x's per week, don't drink caffine, minimal sugar, no processed foods, etc. etc. When I finally made the PMDD connection, I read about how to reduce symptoms holistically and I have been taking a ton of herbs and vitamins for 2 months.

I see no change, in fact, this month (now) I am so overwhelmed and agitated that I started a fight with my BFF and my husband and yelled at my 2 y.o. for dumping his cheerios on the ground. I hate myself like this and I feel there is no hope

I hate anti-deppresants and feel I should be mentally "strong" enough to battle this by sheer will power...but I'm not strong enough...and that makes me feel even mre defeated and depressed.

I feel like this PMDD stuff is all in my head and I should just get over it.

What now?


mamahormone mamahormone
4 Responses Mar 12, 2009

I have pmdd too. It is not in your head and you cant just get over it. It is a monthly battle/struggle. Trust me i know exactly what you are talking about! You have to discuss with your dr what is the best type of medication/herbal remedies which are right for you. If it doesnt work you try something else until you find that one thing that works for you. No one thing works for everyone. And remember nothing is full proof unless you get a full hysterectomy. Good luck. But also you can go on facebook and look up pmdd survivors keep truckin, its a closed group of supportive women all suffering pmdd it helps so much to know your not alone. Xoxo

It's not all in your head and there is no way to "just get over it". But you can manage your symptoms through nutrition and awareness. Awareness is the key. For more information on the subject, I have written a blog, Living on a Prayer, Living With PMDD, that shares my research on the subject over the past three years. Perhaps the information there will be of some help.

My daughter is 15 and she did try to commit suicide from PMDD symptoms!!!!!

I just tried 5-HTP and it is the first thing in 5 years that has helped me. I only take 50mg dose and only during the ten or so days before my period. Don't take it all the time because your body will just eventually adapt and it wil lstop working. Also, DO NOT take it with any SSRI's - deadly combo. You could get major seratonin overload. 5-HTP is tryptophan that gets converted into seratonin and is able to pass the blood brain barrier. At night , it converts in to melonin which helps you sleep better. Look it up. I bought Swanson brand. It has saved my life. the PMDD was absolute killing me. Starting at age 30 and by age 35, I was having serious thoughts of suicide during PMDD time. SSRI's have way more side effects than they are worth ... hair loss, weight gain, acne, loss of self, libido issus ,the list is endless . - oh, and they don't work forever either. Please, look up 5-HTP.

I too found 5-htp and it does really help! I have been trying to figure out the right dose for me and when to take it. Lots of opinions out there. I will try your suggestion of just taking it the 10 days before period and see who that works. I have 100 mg pills as that was cheaper than the 50, go figure. I may stick with 100 but try just once a day. I have been taking like 200 MG at bedtime but sometimes get forgetful and whammo - PMDD symptoms are back. Hence how I found this blog. Seeking more support online for the terrible day I am having...

I too have pmdd and on cipralex (SSRI) for a few years now. I was thinking about "converting" to 5-htp. How did you do it? I can't even think about not being "covered" and loosing the ballance I worked so hard for!