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I Have Poland Syndrome

22 Yr Old Female With Ps

By: robinxleigh122
Written on April 9th, 2012
I was diagnosed with PS before I had my first birthday. Growing up was tough. When I hit puberty other girls noticed and mocked me for have one breasts developing, and not the other. I am missing the right pectoral muscle. I guess you could say I'm lucky as that's the only thing different about me. But I've felt like a freak my whole like. I've asked "why God? Why me?" About a million times. About as many times as I've cried myself to sleep for feeling like only 1/2 a woman. I don't wear swim suits or low cut tops because you can see the size difference in my breast. Its especially hard when all your friend wanna go swimming and you wear a shirt to swim in like guys do. Even more so when its 105 degree texas weather and you feel too self conscious to wear just a tank top and shorts. I wear a tank top under tshirts to "even" out my chest. I use bra inserts in the right side of my bra everyday.

I'm about to pursue corrective surgery, but I'm not sure how to cover the cost as I work in a factory and insurance doesn't cover it. So everything will be out of pocket. So its next to impossible to cover. But I'm willing to take out as many loans as I can and ruin my credit for life just to feel normal like everyone else.

My mom said the doctor told her it was a physical handicap, but I will not consider myself handicapped for this horrible birth defect. My right side is just as strong, if not stronger than my left. I pick up 40 lbs boxes everynight. It has never physically slowed me down. I wish I could say the same for the emotional and mental side of it though. I got the short end of the stick but I will feel normal in my own skin one day!
By: robinxleigh122
Age: 22-25
557 people have read this story

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3 responses
  • PhoenixOfTheOranges
    PhoenixOfTheOranges

    Because it's a birth defect, if you stay focused on taking the steps needed insurance will cover the surgery because it's reconstructive not cosmetic. After 10 years of dealing with insurance denying me I finally got the approval last week :) if you have a good Primary Care Physician he or she can help reffer you to a good plastic surgeon. I had surgery 10 years ago and out of desperation to "fix" my chest I settled for a bad plastic surgeon and the surgery was totally botched. I also am missing my pectoral muscle and only developed on one side. At 14 I was wearing a C cup bra and stuffing the other side to balance it. (yeah... That was terrible being made fun of for having one boob and stuffing my bra) I thought after having an implant put in it I'd be fixed but because the surgery wasn't done correctly I still I wear a tank top under everything to cover it and I don't wear swimsuits. Feeling sexy is a battle, but one I'm willing to overcome - its all in your head. Like I said though, it's taken years of fighting with my insurance to have the surgery covered. If the Dr. you go to isn't helpful in advising you how to have it covered by insurance than I suggest you find a better Dr. Some surgeons just want the business and we're just dollar signs to them, other surgeons actually CARE and tear up when they see you cry when they say "you'll be able to wear a swimsuit". I found an amazing therapist too who had breast cancer and understands the frustration of feeling like 1/2 a woman. Ive had to do a lot of searching to find a good therapist too lol but she's helped me tremendously with my self image and my emotional stability. Don't give up and don't make life decisions out of desperation. I strongly suggest focusing on finding the right people to help you, that care about your struggle and are willing to point you in the right direction. Poland Syndrome is enough of a battle on its own, adding debt and bad credit to that battle isn't necessary. Thank you for sharing!!! It's eautiful hearing the stories of other women like me :)

    Aug 11, 2012
    2 likes
  • ReRe512
    ReRe512

    Yeah for you! My daughter is going through the same thing. She was just denied surgery by insurance. They claim it isn't a priority. She's devistated. I too will do the same as you. First we will appeal it and then hit the loan office. I agree, it is emotionally draining and I have had to watch her suffer for many years. Keep me posted and i sincerly will keep you in my prayers for Help.

    God Bless

    ReRe512

    Jun 13, 2012
    1 like
  • marie444
    marie444

    you can finance the surgery, there was only a 20% chance insurance would cover mine. I was blessed because they paid to have both breat corrected and now mine look very normal, if not better then normal! I understand how hard it is for you to live with this, and I pray you get to have the surgery and very soon! God bless you!

    Apr 18, 2012
    2 likes