My Struggle With Ptsd

First off I would like to say that everyone should buy this book. It is so helpful.
The Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Sourcebook
By Glenn R. Schiraldi

My incident happened in 2010. Ever since then I have felt so shattered. Like there are entire chunks of me that are missing. That I'm dead inside. I constantly have flashbacks and are thrust into reliving every moment in my mind. I try to stop the flashbacks but it's so hard. Sometimes it feels so real that I don't even realize it is a flashback. It's suffocating. I also have a very hard time watching certain movies now. Before the incident I loved horror movies. Now I can barely sit through one without having a panic attack and a wave of flashbacks. Now I avoid them at all costs. I have noticed other certain triggers to this madness but some of them are hard to avoid in my life. Right after it happened in 2010 I went to a therapist for about a month but then we moved and I never sought out another one. I spend alot of time reading to find out how to help myself. Yesterday I confessed what I suffer through every day to my husband. He was very understanding and told me that he believes I have PTSD. With that one line I instantly felt that this could be the answer to my insanity. With new hope for help I rushed to the bookstore and bought this book. I couldn't put it down. With every chapter I tore through I FINALLY felt like someone understood what I have been exhaustedly suffering through for the past few years. For once I felt like I wasn't as entirely insane as I thought I was. One line really sticks with me from the book, "PTSD is a normal response to an abnormal situation." I found myself agreeing with every line I read. Sitting in the bookstore saying "yes" outloud without even meaning to. I finally feel like I am not alone in my flashes and sadness and brokenness. I have hope for the first time. Of that I am glad. Though I must suffer through every day flashes, maybe one day it won't feel so terrifying. Thank you for having me in your group. I feel that it will really help me to know of others who go through the same things.
ShatteredGirl ShatteredGirl
26-30, F
Jan 10, 2013