My Unusual Realization

I finally just realized something I guess is a plus for me but in an unfortunate way. Basically I realized the worst of me, being my frequent black outs, may have helped me in some way with issues that many other people with POTS struggle with. I see it all the time about people who have families, friends, and even health professionals tell them "it's all in their head" or "suck it up, it's not that bad" or "your just lazy" or "it's just anxiety" or many other things that show doubt or disbelief. These people report that basically the people saying those things don't believe it's POTS because most appear seemingly healthy so they don't understand what they truly go through. They can't see the fatigue or actual dizziness or any of the numerous other less apparent or hidden symptoms. Many of these POTS sufferers don't receive support from these people and some even get treated quite poorly. Many sufferers who experience any of this feel like these people don't believe them or just don't try to understand and many have difficulties being diagnosed. Doctors not familiar with POTS associate a lot of the symptoms to anxiety and in numerous cases this becomes the diagnosis or the same happens in regards to some other illness. They go misdiagnosed for years. It seems to me from all the stories I have read like these, the person with POTS typically has mild to moderate symptoms or only a few symptoms which makes their POTS less apparent which might be the cause of the way others react and treat them. Well in my case where 3 initial black outs led to an extended stay in the hospital, mine was recognized and diagnosed immediately. Also, because I have frequent black outs that have been observed by enough people, I never did and still don't get treated poorly by anyone. My family and friends never once questioned me or what was going on and in fact the severity of my symptoms led them to research on their own to become more familiar. So I never experienced what these other people do. Basically, the additional symptom of black outs seems to give people visual "evidence" that can't just be ignored, cant be explained simply, and can't be easily or ignorantly mistaken as something it isn't. For instance, someone would not say "it's just anxiety" if presented with my case. Basically, it seems the worse your case is, the better reactions and treatment by others you receive. It makes sense actually. As humans, if we see something then it is there. If someone tells us something is there but you can't physically see it, you become hesitant and questioning. Additionally, it makes some sense as to how misdiagnosess are made, being that some of the symptoms are common among numerous diagnoses, such as fatigue. Also different combinations of certain symptoms could correlate to another diagnosis, for instance, someone with POTS could complain of fatigue, increased heart rate, shakes, chills, and dizziness or lightheadedness which correlates to symptoms of anxiety. In any case, the summary of my realization is that my black outs are, in my opinion, the reason I was diagnosed so quickly and accurately and the reason I had no issues with family and friends and receive all the support in the world. Although in a sense it was a good thing, it doesnt change the fact that my black outs are the worst thing and a part of me wishes I was in the other people's shoes. If I were in their shoes I would not have the black outs. But I also could not have the support and may have gone a long time without being diagnosed properly. I guess it's one of those situations where you take the good with the bad. I feel fortunate to have so much support and it makes me happy so I hope this realization can at least remind me that without my "bad" (the black outs), I might not have the "good"(support).
aljones414 aljones414
26-30, F
Jan 13, 2013