A Loved One, A Cousin I Never Met, A Man I Barely Knew, And My Child . . .

I don't consistently have premonitions.  I'm trying to understand the significance of the ones I HAVE had.  My very first that I can remember was when I was an 8th grader.  I dreamt that there was a haze and soft white light all around me.  I looked up to see what I would consider to be angels coming down, they told me that they had to take my father but that they would be back for him.  I screamed, was hysterical, helpless and they returned very quickly.  I turned to look away before I could see anything, knowing that their intention was to take him to heaven.  When I turned, there was a huge mirror with cracks as though it was on the verge of breaking, but in the mirror, it wasn't me.  It was my father staring back at me with tears rolling down his cheeks.   The panic and anguish was so real, I woke up a mess and ran to my parents room and pleaded with my parents not to let anything happen to my dad.  Later that day, we received a phone call from my uncle that my Grandmother, my dad's mother had passed away suddenly.  Probably two years later, I woke up startled and told my parents that one of my teacher's husband who had been dealing with brain tumor was going to die.  They had reached a point where it was known that he was terminal, everything that could be done, they had already tried.  I did not know these people well, she had been a teacher of mine in elementary and by this time I was in high school.  I only knew that he was sick, everyone in our small community knew.  He died within a day of me telling my parents.   Then, my Senior year, my mother woke me one morning because I was not out of bed as I should have been by that time.  My mother said that I sat up, almost jarred by her coming into the room, and just blurted out, "Glen is going to die today."  He was my Dad's cousin that I had never met, but that we knew was struggling with complications from Aids.  After that, nothing much happened until April of this year.  On March 20th, I found out I was expecting our third child.  We had only been trying for a month.  Easter morning I woke up and told my husband that I had a dream.  In my dream, I woke up to discover blood all over my bed.  I had miscarried in my dream.  It was that day that I started bleeding and would have been 8 weeks pregnant the day the doctors officially confirmed that I had miscarried.  With my grandmother and my child, I feel as though these premonitions are God's way of preparing me for the loss.  But what about the other two?  I don't understand it.     
catnis catnis
May 24, 2012