FOUND Myself,now Lost Again

I met her on the internet,i had chatted to a few people but nobody like her.Nobody I clicked with like that,and definately nobody that ever made me laugh like her.I had never been with a woman beore but knew I wanted to.Fairly quickly I realised I wanted to be with her.Not just in bed but really wanted to spend time with her.I knew she felt the same and we said it often.Ater a couple of months of chatting and flirting she asked would i still like her to visit me(she lives on the other side of the world)Of course I wanted her to come.By the next day she had booked her ticket and i spent the next few weeks excited but very nervous.I guess I knew I wouldnt be what she was looking for,that would be too good to be true.I met her at the airport and was so nervous i could barely look at her.She was calm and fantastic and i had no doubt i wanted her!We spent a couple of weeks together and it was great.So I finally new what it was like to sleep with a woman.I new when it was time or her to go home I would be a bit upset,bt I didnt realise how much.Someone had finally showed me I could live my life this way and be happy.Beore she went back I new I wasnt the one for her,not anything serious.We still talk online but its different now,which makes me sad,but I dont want to lose her friendship.I worry sometimes that she only still keeps in contact because she doesnt want to hurt me,because thats the sort of person she is.I only wish we still laughed like we used to.She doesnt seem happy and i hope I am not making her miserable because i wouldnt want to do see I LOVE HER!

jm1968 jm1968
Mar 23, 2009