Afraid To Fall Asleep

It's been seven months since I started feeling like this. Every single time I fall asleep, I have nightmares; they're always along the same line and I know it's not real, but it scares me to fall asleep. I don't want people to sit here, reading this and think, "Well, what a god damn freak," but it's so scary. It's always death, drowning in an endless pool of blood, an out of body view where I see myself the way I was the night I tried to commit suicide, but seizing or the reoccurrence of the guy that strangled me with all my old friends standing around me laughing. These may seem kind of weird, but it's so hard.. I used to like sleep, but it's gotten so hard and I just don't know where to go. I'm starting this new med called topamax, but I worry it won't work because the cyproheptadine didn't work very long. And I doubt the lexapro is working anymore... I just don't know where to go.. Thank you for listening..
Kthnxbai Kthnxbai
13-15, F
1 Response Dec 15, 2012

Think happy thoughts before you fall asleep or something else positive. It might affect your dreams.