I Am Disfellowshiped Jehovah Witness

I was married 32 years and serving jehovah. I had a heart attack I died and was given a 2nd chance at life. At heart rehab I met a wonderful guy we became freinds then more. I didn't plan on this tohappen howevder I was molested at 16 by a priest and then my pysical ed teacher in high school. My kids where upset at first but ok now. I lost my mother she is a witenss my sister is too and a brother. I finally feel happy for the first time in my life. My ex wife is so mad at me I don't know if we will ever be able to talk I feel bad for hurtung her but I have to be happy with who I am and what i want out of life I live in Topeka Ks
joeksboy123 joeksboy123
51-55
1 Response Aug 1, 2010

<p>Like you, I have been disfellowshipped for sometime. I have never married because I never thought I could pull it off. I always knew from a young age I was attracted to men. I hid it as best I could growing up. I was angry for along time trying to figure out why I felt this way. Finally I entered into a relationship with another man. I thought I was finally happy. extremely happy even. But there was always something eating at the back of my brain . I started having panic attacks. I had to end the relationship. I began questioning the Bible and it's authenticity or maybe the interpretation of sc<x>riptures.. It bothered me so badly I started studying EVERYTHING. I realized that if the Bible is real and means what it implies (which I now know it does) then the error had to lie within ME. I realized that imperfection effects us all in so many different ways than I had previously imagined. It can effect us mentally, physically, emotionally, sexually, spiritually, etc... I am now trying to be reinstated with the hope of being able to help anyone I can as the end is now being accomplished before it is to late. Even though I have a DEEP desire for companionship and intimacy in all the ways you probably do now, Due to my love and faith in Jehovah being greater, I am willing and able to live out the rest of this system of things with all the other single people doing Gods will until the time comes when we will all be perfect. Remember, Jehovah LOVES you! and he wants you to do what is right. But in order to do that you need the TRUTH and pray for the right heart condition If you are ever to REALLY be free. Sincerely, Someone who cares!