Something To Be Proud Of

I was at a public pool last week and I saw a woman with scars on her thighs, arms, and shoulders, they were clearly self harm scars. She wasn't hiding them at all and she didn't look the least bit embarrassed. Not only did I admire her but I also felt calmed that someone (even a stranger) there understood something so many people don't. I felt like I had an ally.

I have scars on my arms from cutting. I used to try and hide them but now I am in a way proud of them. No, I don't flaunt them or even tell everyone who asks about them what they really are from, but I can now look down at them and see them as a tool. If I can be affected the way I was by just seeing another person that understand my situation then why can't I do the same for others?

I have overcome a lot and I have learned even more on the way, I have been humbled by seeing I am not invincible, my scars are reminders of that. The ability to understand another beings situation is something to be proud of, not something to hide.

Thank you to the brave, beautiful stranger at the pool.
thereisnothingwrongwithyou thereisnothingwrongwithyou
22-25, F
6 Responses Jul 23, 2012

I feel judged by people when they see my scars. that is why i started to hide them on my legs. i just don't wear anything above my knees now. the ones on my wrist have faded that you won't see them unless you look. i hope someday that people's judgement won't matter anymore.

I hope someday people's judgement won't matter to you anymore too.
Best of luck, let me know if you ever need to talk :)

Thank you for this story. I'm constantly struggling with my scars, and It's nice to read a story and have hope that one day I can open up.

Yeah for sure, you have a story to tell, that is nothing to be ashamed of :)

Thank you. While I'm still struggling with cutting, my scars are becoming a teaching tool. It's good to know that others are proud of their scars, and willing to tell the stories behind them.

I used to be ashamed of my scars. I saw it as a weakness and i hated that and kept thinking to myself if i did it once what's stopping me from doing it again? When i turned 18 i got the japanese symbol for overcome tattooed over it. I can still see the scars but everytime i think about maybe doing it again and i look down, i smile because i really have overcame it.

Good I'm glad you have overcome such a difficult obstacle. And it sounds like your tattoo is even more of a powerful symbol to you because of it.
I have Believe tattooed on my wrist, which often keeps me from cutting and also keeps me going.

It is very important to me. I don't believe in getting tattoo for decoration, there has to be a meaning behind it. I'm getting another one on my shoulder for christmas :)

I agree. What is your new one going to be? I have another on my foot that I designed, it represents my family.

A fire poppy. They bloom after fires. I want it to be a black, burnt, vine-y pattern starting on my collarbone and then travel over my sholder and down/around my shoulder blade where the flower will be in bright red.

That sounds really cool. What does it mean/stand for?

It's like the phoenix pretty much. rebirth kind of thing. i just feel like thats overdone though and i wanted something original

Well I'd say that is original, I like it!

thanks :)

5 More Responses

you and Flyera have somethings in common and I would like to be your friend just like hers. I hope in some way sometime I can help and be part of a solution. I can't add you cause of your settings but if you friend me I will be there for YOU and try and give you whatever adice you need. I am 40 and have had a lot of **** happen in my life and all I got to give is knowledge and an ear to listen. hope you'll add me and we can maybe chat soon take care of yourself and I really am proud of you girls for sharing stories like these. they take alot of courage to do and thank you for sharing. Friend me and see how we go and if ya dont like me delete me or block me or whatever I am just here to help.

I wish I could do that without ppl making fun of me or gossiping. I really do admire the person you saw at the pool too. I want to be able to not care too.

thanks for the encouragement. I have tried it somewhat on occasions but not in crowded places cause I'm a little paranoid bout people. I went inside a convient store to pay for gas a couple weeks ago wearing my basketball shorts, a tee shirt, and made me so nervous cause there was like 4 people in there buying stuff and when I reached for the change the nice old lady at the register paused looked down my arm and said um hmm before putting change in my hand. I've never had grandparents but I like to imagine they would be like her. I wanted to just run out but I stood my ground. She smiled at me and said have a nice night...I was very worried she was going to say something but she was cool. Kinda gave me some very small piece of hope that there are nice people out there that have enough respect not to say anything even if they are thinking it. I smiled back and told her thank you then walked out a little proud for a second even though my heart was pounding so hard I could hardly hear the passing cars. thank you again for your encouragement. maybe I'll be brave this weekend and go to the beach and not be afraid to take my shirt off when somebody might see me maybe.

there are some nice people out there and nowadays cutters are more known about than what they were years ago so you will probably find people will treat you with a little more respect rather than the wierdo factor that WAS years and years ago. Any question or probs you got give me a buzz and see what I can do. I am just a good guy who's intentions are good.