My Experience With Schizoaffective Disorder

At the age of 35 I had my first psychotic break. I recall reading a book and suddenly the words changed-they became very dark and disturbing. But when I told my ex partner all he said was, "The words didn't change!" As the days went by I became more and more stressed and delusional. I couldn't sleep and I couldn't eat. I was psychotic for 2 or 3 days before my ex asked me if I wanted to go the mental hospital, or to the acupuncturist. I said "hospital." It was a state run hospital and as soon as I arrived the nurse grabbed me by the arm and yelled at me to get moving. At some point I was given some medicine and then collapsed to the floor. A nurse grabbed me and yelled "Get off the floor!" I had all sorts of scary hallucinations and was in the hospital for about 2 weeks.

I was afraid to stay on the meds because my ex had read a book citing the dangers of antipsychotics. He told me he wanted me to get off the meds asap, so I only took the meds whenever I felt I was going to become psychotic, and as a result, had several psychotic breaks over a ten year period. I also had 2 episodes of major depression--one was a result of going off my meds too quickly. It was so bad that it affected how my surroundings looked. I wasn't getting any better, so I did some research online and read up on Seroquel. Not only is it a good antipsychotic (fewer side effects) but it is also used to treat major depression. So I started taking Seroquel and within a month or so my depression lifted. I've been on Seroquel for 4 years now and I'm very happy with it. I know the meds aren't perfect, but it's all we've got at the moment and I think it's important to take them. People are surprised when I tell them I have a mental illness. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones because my illness is not as severe as is it for others.
mnkygrl mnkygrl
46-50, F
3 Responses Sep 22, 2012

you're welcome, Mchanan. Sorry to hear that, Angedoux. Did you find another med to take? I learned something about Seroquel the other day. I was talking to a lawyer, who sits on a mental health board and he told me that Seroquel is quite different from the other antipsychotics. Not only does it have fewer side effects, but it also is not that good at preventing psychosis. It's more for mood stabilization. But it works well for me. I've been on it for 4 years now and have had no problems. I like how it makes me fall asleep within 1-2 hours after taking it.

Nice to hear that seroquel worked for you... I was on it a year ago but had to stop it because I was more stressed and was having a continuous feeling of a pressure on the top of my head.

I'm very sorry that things aren't going well for you. Unfortunately, it can take years to find the right meds.

Tell me about it....24 years and counting lol

omg. that's awful. life is not fair.

<p>Hello there - Thanks for sharing your story, I have very similar story in household as well and mr Myr had her forst psychotic episode in 2012 while we're in holidays. Then, she wan on anti-depressants and annt-psychotic meds but as she stopped taking then after a year (thinking she's fine & started going full-time to her work), second episode strike in 2012 summer. This one was quite different, no depressive symptoms but very aggressive personality & delusional personality. I am afraid meds are not the only cure, she's on her road to recovery. I'll share this artcile with her.. Thanks - </P>