Regret

I am sitting in my school's library, a small community college in Minnesota. Next to me is my textbook from my math class: Intermediate Algebra. And that is where this story of regret takes us to. It deals with school. And my mind.
I grew up with my mother being single, with a brother and a sister. I passed through junior high, went to high school and stuck to myself. I was a nice kid( I still am), but there was, and still is,a problem with me: I was lazy. And that has held me back so much more than what I ever thought possible.
When I entered college, I was not prepared for how much I would have to study, and that has shown itself in my math grades. I have had to take pre-algebra three times because I never studied, I got a 'D' in Intro to Algebra, and am taking Inermediate Algebra for the second time and will most likely have to take it another time. I am tired of repating math classes, and am three years behind in math. I have just come to my senses about what I am doing, but I fear it is too late. I have a love of math and would like to use it, but lets be honest, no engineering program would ever accept me now.
I am having such regret over my foolishness. All those hours avoiding homework were not worth the pain it has caused me, but I can't change the past. It is all my fault, and that is painful. I have made a mess, and ther consequences may be irreparable. I just need hope that I can redeem myself, but I also know that the idea of beign an engineer now, when I am in my third year of college, is probably not realistic.
I am just hopeless. Every few seconds my pain and regrets come to mind, especially as I see my friends going off to be successful engineers. The things which excite me most, math and science,are out of my reach for a career, and it is all my fault. So my regret is being lazy over math. If I had listened to advice, I would be far better off and have a shot, but now, I don't think I do. And that hurts more than I care to think about. I have already thought about it enough.
tsegaye1 tsegaye1
18-21
1 Response Nov 30, 2012

I am not the right person to talk to if you want advice in math. I took Statistics twice, I got a D and then retook it for a C.

Then I took Calculus three times. I took it in summer school even though math is my weakest subject. I thought, how tough could it be if I take it in summer school? Answer...about 10 times harder because you use the same book, take the same tests and have the same requirements that you do if you take it during a full semester except you have to do it in 4 weeks. I got a F, then a D, then a C.

But I never gave up. My first two years in college I had a 2.5 average, but then I started taking my core classes in Business which was my main interest. I had a 3.83 average in my major and graduated with a degree in Management with a 2.96 average. I wish it was a 3.0 but no biggee.. I was just happy to graduate.......lol

Engineering programs are competitive. But what if you were to major in Physics, IT or Chemistry or perhaps even Civil Engineering or Petroleum Engineering ?

Just try to take something that is similarly related and branch off from that.

I shot myself in the foot when I started college, but I continued my education and earned my MBA in 2006. I have not really benefited from it, but it was a long term goal I had and I finally reached it.

If you can't get accepted to an engineering program in mechanical or electrical engineering, perhaps something similarly related. You haven't failed until you quit.

Good luck !