Looking For Advice!

I work with this group and we act together. I have never worked with them before but I had to audition to get there. We are performing a show this week and after the second show there is a huge cast party. It starts around 8:00 PM and can go all the way to 2 AM even though we have another show the next day.
Anyway, part of this cast party is an 'initiation ritual,' something I have never had to do. It was described as "only painful at first." I don't know anyone really who is part of the cast but everyone is expected to go to the cast party. I hate parties at all, really, because they're too loud and too long and there are too many people. Most of the cast are really looking forwards to it though (something I really don't understand.) I don't think I could survive that long with those people.
So, I decided that my parents would forbid me from going. I feel like these are my options: go and be really uncomfortable, borderline fear, for eight hours with a bunch of teenagers really late at night ten minutes away from a ride home, or skip the entire thing and not get 'initiated' into the group and have to go through two more plays with them before leaving and seeing few of them ever again, potentially.
I have told my parents that I will not go but if I changed my mind, they would be fine.

So, should I go or not go? Any advice at any time is fine.
Adadastralgi Adadastralgi
18-21
3 Responses May 8, 2012

I'm still fine accepting advice (it might happen again, after all) but here's my report. I went, planning to leave at ten. I actually left at 10:30. It was really fun. The initiation was built up to way more than it ought to have been. And in the end, it was fun. I'm happy I didn't stay until 2 or whenever, but if I do it again, I'd probably stay later.<br />
<br />
:-)

The fact that you auditioned and have been invited should show you some<br />
acceptance by these people...definitely go to the party afterwards...do not lie<br />
to yourself before you get started in life. Be cautious of people you don't know<br />
in the beginning. Be aware of initiations...keep your wits about you, don't drink or<br />
smoke. If you want to keep your time at a minimum, advise your host, you are<br />
joining the party however, you have something else to do after about an hour or<br />
so...then have your parents pick you up!. Have fun! regards,sugar

Perhaps your answer does not have to be so black or white. You mention you are 10 minutes away from the party location. I wonder than if you could arrange with your parents to stay awhile and then be picked up when you start to feel overwhelmed. In so far as the "initiation" I too have been an actor and a dancer, in most cases of an "initiation" into such things there is a certain mystery built into it, that can produce fear but in the end it is only really an act and nothing at all scary happens. In so far as the social anxiety the only way to get any better in that is to keep trying, never give up, never settle for closing yourself off from the world even it is only a little bit of exposure to the world, for a short time, practice, practice, practice.......This is what I have learned about my own social anxiety............. (: I hope this helps in some way

i agree. We live in a world with people. If you get too comfortable being away from people then you're going to grow up being more and more distant from people. At some point you might me invited for a lunch meeting with a future boss, or a double date with your girlfriend and 2 friends...or a outing somewhere with friends. If you run away from being social then you're going to have a hard life. Go to the initiation..they wont kill you. If you get bored then just go home. You might even like it.