I Get Emotionally Attached Too Easily

I am pretty conflicting. I tend to come across distant and spaced out. Moreover, I have a hard time properly communicating with people and with developing/maintaining meaningful relationships. That being said, it's no wonder that I frequently feel extreme bouts of loneliness. When I have occasional friendly interactions with people, it's a big deal to me. I become giddy, and I'll immediately want to befriend them. I can get emotionally attached very easily, and that scares me because it can get to a point where I obsess over someone I may have only met once for merely a few minutes.

I like getting to know people, listening to their stories, getting an idea of how they see life. The funny thing is that once I start to get to know more about people, I'm quick to making up excuses as to why we could never have a lasting friendship by pointing out our differences (eg. age, hobbies, interests, personalities, etc.). I know this all might sound crazy and ridiculous, and I know that I'm just setting up myself to be lonely. But at the same time, I'm scared of sharing things about myself with others and scared of embarrassment, rejection, disrespect, and being left behind. People have their own agendas, so it's inevitable that people I meet will leave at some point - nothing personal. That's just how life is sometimes. But I can't disregard the fact that it's painful when people I become attached to go away. It's also difficult when I have to leave behind people I care about too...

Severing close friendships and connections is such a painful thing, and commitment to long-term relationships [on any level] can be tiring. But I still can't help but desire these connections. Depending on how you see it, I guess I'm just hopelessly optimistic or "stupid" in the sense that I will always want to pursue deep, platonic connections with others even though I know I will get hurt. I mean, it's only natural that people want permanent meaningful relationships. We all have a need to belong to some degree. I know there's a lot for me to improve on, especially my negative self-talk. I am optimistic that I will be able to sort things out, gain more control over my emotions, and become more cautious with emotionally attaching myself to others so easily.
deleted deleted
1 Response Nov 29, 2012

I am 19 years old and I am experiencing the same situation. I've no clue what to do about it, and I hope things will improve for me. Attachment hurts a lot, and I'm wallowing in self-pity all the time, feeling sorry for myself. :(