I Never Feel Like Being With Other People

Since I was a kid I never had a very close friend even friends, even at a boarding school(high school), I always a loner, even at college and now at work and at the University I still fail to socialise I don't know why. I have a flat mate everytime when I come frm work I go straight to my bed room or go to university for my evening classes. Even if I stay with him in the lounge I don't know what to say. I guess I wasn't made to socialise.

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26-30
4 Responses Feb 12, 2009

I shy away from most social contact as well and while I guess I am a fellow loner I hate admitting that to myself. It fills me with dread and self-loathing.<br />
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I know that some people are loners and that it is just who they are- but i can't understand how people can ever be truly happy all alone. I'm comfortable alone but i wouldn't say i was happy. Does the fact that you are a loner bother you?

I have lots of good advice if you ever need some and I will always encourage you and make you feel better if you need it.. I believe in you. If you really want to improve, it's possible. :)<br />
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Oh, and I have so much happiness that I really don't need anything else from God and the world. My main purpose in life is to help people find happiness. My dream is to help people with SA face their fears so that they can be happy one day. Because I never thought it was possible to be happy, but I did it! And I thank God everyday for this blessing. You can have it too.<br />
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Also if you have depression, you might need to work on that first before you work on the SA. So please ask me questions if you need to, ok?

Yeah, I know it is a lot of work. I had to do all the hard work to overcome it. But the reward is so great. I no longer care what people think of me anymore. I'm free. I'm strong now. I used to have no friends when I came to college, but now everyone is so proud of me for being so confident and unafraid. You can have a beautiful life. It is very, very possible.<br />
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I recommend getting a therapist who knows how to treat social anxiety. Then even though it's difficult and even though you are scared out of your mind, you do it because in the end, you know you will be free. Trust me. It works. Believe in your therapist. Believe my story. <br />
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In order to do this, the only thing you need is bravery and faith.

awww... well, I can help you if you want to change. :) I don't know if you read my Social anxiety story, but I used to have social anxiety disorder really bad, but I got a therapist and now I'm a whole new awesome person. :)<br />
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In therapy, they teach you about exposures. Exposures pretty much means that you have to face your fears in order to realize that nothing bad will actually happen. It is very hard and difficult. But you start off with the little things that make you nervous such as eye contact or waving at a friend. You keep doing this until you realize "oh, nothing bad happens." So it won't make you nervous anymore. So after you master that, you go on to the next thing that makes you nervous like just saying "hi how are you?" <br />
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The important thing to do after you do exposures is to reward yourself because you are so awesome and brave! You did something that was so hard. So get yourself some ice cream. :)<br />
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Understand? I can help if you really want to change. :) But it's up to you. I know you can do it. But do you know you can do it?