Im A Teenager And I Think I Have A Social Phobia.
Im 18 yearsold girl. I don't have any friends at school now and Im really alone. I feel so uncomfortable being around people and I feel that the only place or people I feel comfortable is at my house with my family. I do have two close friends and few people I feel comfortable being around from my high school but most of the time we got to be close through texting or chatting(except for my two best friends). Now that we are all in college, I dont get to see them as much as before, and seeing them enjoying college and making new friends worries me that they might be forgetting about me. And that is aggaravating my loneliness even more. I sometimes texted them but most of the time they reply very late or very short unlike before they reply with much details and things to tell me. Now they seem to heve lot of things to do and busy with other things and i feel left out. I tried to make friends at my school now but it didn't work. Everytime someone talks to me i answere very quick and short. I cant even think of a topic to talk about so the conversation stops and the person talking to me endup getting bored with me and talk to someone else. I was even invited to eat lunch with a group of girls. They seem really nice but I couldnt relate or enjoy to any of their conversation and while I was sitting with them at the cafeteria, I couldnt stop but to feel so awkward and uncomfortable and I felt like choking or suffocation(figuratively speaking). Some peole tried to talk to me and smiled at me but I cant smile back properly.( cuz im anxious that wen i smile i look like im in pain or an idiot...) so many of my batchmates think like im a loner and dont wanna be friends with them. But i dont blame them for thinking like that. Im just not confident enough to think that somone actually wants to be friends with me or interested in me. now, Some of my classmates talk to me or say hi but i just say hi back and try not to talk longer cuz i feel like their doing that out of pity for me and i dont want anyone to think that im feeling lonly. im pretty much sure why i am like this. I've been like this since 6th grade when i was bullied by group of boys and I was loner for the whole entire year. since then i became so anxious and unconfident with myself and until now i am not recovered from the painful experience i had during my 6th grade. I really need help and advise. even a word of comfort might ease my loneliness.