Aroused By The Darkness Of Social Phobia

 I had previously suffered from social phobia. I thought it was very tricky.  while in junior high school,  I have no friends at all. It makes me so alienated there. everyone thought I was weird. until my teacher wasconfused about this myself. sometimes I'm very jealous of all those who have friends. and I thought I was justhaving this oddity. I'm trying to find someone who has a weirdness like this.Indonesia was in there someone who rarely develop the disease. I was verydepressed about this. but now, I have become more useful. Now I can already feel the affection of a friend would. new people who can change me. but with my oldneighbors, I was not able to communicate with them.
sometimes I think to go from where I was born, and find a new place. perhaps with it, I was more able to enjoy the beauty of social relations. vocational high schoolalthough I was quite able to adjust. but still there are some friends who consider meweird. because I could only fit a few people.
when there is someone who intimidates amelia me. I always regret my lack of it. My heartturns like peas. hope it all does not happen to me.

ameliasolekha ameliasolekha
13-15, F
3 Responses May 6, 2012

me too, i do remember it begin since my junior high school sophomore year, it feels as all of the people eyes were watching me, my old friends on elementary sch back then avoiding me, there just one friend fine beside of me, i tend to be afraid talking in front of the class, til' now, i was stuttered, shaking up, and sweats a lot....it's uncomforfortable, the worst was when people judge me wrong, as if they're told me a selfish girl, i just too shy being around of them,, i wish there's just someone can understand me fully..

Hope u manage Ur social phobia well.

Social anxiety is tricky stuff. I had it for 15 years and probably longer, always being a sensitive and shy kid. Very glad to see you got over it!

yeah you're right! It's all very disturbing social relations.
wow 15 years is a very long time. the same as my age.
Well thank you :)
if there is a strong will and intention, we can surely change