Examination Of Love

I have made a discovery! lol... on a very serious note..... I have been asking myself lately ..."Why haven't i found love?"

The answer hit me upside my head till my brain hurts but my soul... is enlightened!

It is because I did not love myself!!!! I did not demand the respect.... i deserved, allowed behavior that was not exceptable, settled.

If i had loved myself enough.... most relationships should of never got off the ground but....

Just because i have been this way all my life .... doesn't mean i will be ....the rest of my life.

My innersoul goes...."Who loves ya baby?" I *smile* and say "I do!"
MorningBreeze MorningBreeze
56-60, F
3 Responses Jun 4, 2011

I really enjoy your posts. You are so spot on. It IS about us and not them. It is about what we perceive...it's all subjective. We can change our OWN perspectives and the way we view ourselves and the world/people around us. Thank you for sharing your "awakenings".

hmmm *smile* I don't normally hug stranges but .. (hug) ..lol.. yes, my awakenings. It came slowly, baby steps due to , I believe, it would of been overwheming. But both of my eyes are wide open. I am just waking so.... lol.. alot of newness around. This will be the best experience.. yet! Cause I am older and wiser...lol! Thank you.

oh wow... June 4, 2011 is when I started... waking-up.

Mine was about the same time. I realized that I was in a relationship with a man that could have been the clone of my brother. It was a RUDE awakening, but awoke I did! Still an ongoing unfolding and uncovering, a discovery of who I REALLY am and was all along...it is beautiful, it is painful, it is a journey of light.

Me either (hugging strangers...though not completely true, as I hugged a very old woman in the grocery store the other day, completely out of character for my "past" self)...so, hugging may not be so bad after all. I am hopeful that with age we do become wiser. I prefer the more painful and quicker path, lol. 2 types of therapy, lots of solitude (though not isolating), and a LOT of honesty about me, and my skewed views due to the running "tapes" in my head put their by those who were supposed to value me. I'm cleaning house...tapes are being burned, what's a few (or many) scars compared to a life of blindness. As long as the scars are a tool towards wisdom rather than a reminder of a bleak past.

1 More Response

Great! But isn't also true that one has to do away with the idea of permanent and eternal values like good and bad out of context and accept human beings are just another species and that we should use our brain and not our instincts to decide what is good for every new situation and keep no log of our psychological hurts to misguide us. Otherwise we become just narcissistic

Being that we are humans really makes us no different than other animals so to speak, just a different species...and we ALL (species) have "instincts". I was told by someone whom I trust on a very deep level (instinctually) that if your "brain" or emotions are felt deeply when you think you are using instinct then that instinct is generally incorrect...you go with the instincts that require no additional thought...it's like "in the gut"...no ifs, and's, or but's...it is simply the instinct and not the subconscious. Use them BOTH since we as humans are supposed to use both, being that we are born with BOTH is my take on this one. I TOTALLY agree with your statement that doing away with the idea of permanent and eternal "ideas", "values" is the way to go as they feed the ego state. Ridding ourselves of this "ego" (which is an all too human attribute) is what will keep up from having psychological hurts in the first place or at least not log into them as they are incorrect and distorted views of reality being that they are in the past. Expectation is another one, and the ego is involved with that as well. Interesting how permanent and eternal values seem to be based upon "expectation". As long as we are of the ego there is no where to go but to narcissism.

congratulations. some people never get this concept. love happens when you love yourself. if you arent happy and confident in you, no one else will be either

that is the truth, for sure. yes, i made a choice to better myself by treating myself better!