This Is to Him.
What makes me sick about you is how I'm never good enough for you. No... how I'm actually too good for you but you'll never open your eyes wide enough to see that. You know, you complain constantly about how things in your life are so tough and you're not happy. You complain constantly about never being able to find a good woman. You spend so much time wondering where your happiness is when you could've had it so long ago. That's what makes me sick. I'm sick of being stressed, wondering what I can do to make you happy. Wondering how I can be that woman that you want and that you'll spend your forever with. I'm sick of feeling like there's something wrong with me because you don't appreciate me. And what's worse is putting myself out there with you, and every time getting shot down like it's absolutely crazy to think you'd give me the time of day. Where will you EVER find someone who loves you as unconditionally as I do? Who else will stay up to 9AM with you while you complain about your life? Who else will defend you until her voice goes hoarse if anybody has anything bad or wrong to say about you? Who else will CONSTANTLY play the fool for you, and get laughed at, and talked about because she devotes so much time to you, but still keeps running back despite the hateful and hurtful things other people say about her? And who else ignores all of your faults? I don't think it's fair that I give you so much to get nothing in return. I don't ask you for much of anything... just some attention and an acknowledgement that I'm a real person too, and that the only thing that we can ever talk about is things pretaining to you. I don't like all the career help I've given you, and that you've never given me a thank you. I hate that you use my ideas and call them your own. I hate that I don't mean anything to you. I hate that NOTHING means anything to you. You live life in a dark cloud because you only have one goal... and babe honestly it's a goal that seems further and further away each time you do something to get closer to it. Honestly, babe, you should put your eggs in another basket. As should I. I hate that I can't leave you alone, because I care about you too much. I hate that you don't care that I care. I hate that you date so many girls but never feels happy, because they're empty, and nobody seems to have that thing that you're looking for. I hate that love has to pass me by because you can't love me back. I wish you would try. I wish you'd realize that I am a woman now, and not a little girl. That I know you better than anybody. That I'll be there when everybody else is gone. I'll be there when they all hate you, and when the glory is just a page in ancient history. I hate that because of you, everybody thinks I'm crazy or a golddigger. I hate that you won't tell them that they're wrong. And most of all, I hate that I love you.