I Have Suicidal Thoughts
My Story is long one. I sit and cry sometimes wondering why was I born. Well, here is my story. I was born but given up for adoption. My real mother could not care for me since she was deaf and mute. All my siblings were adopted but I was also adopted for a reason (my mother was raped!) So she did not know who my father was. Anyway, I was in foster care and was adopted into a family. Everything went well until they had a child of there own. My adoptive father abused me as a child. And my adoptive mother mentally and emotionally abused me also. I sit and think why did this happen to me. I am now 29 years old and have no friends because my adoptive mother never let me socialize with anyone. Nor go any where and try to have a life of my own. I never went to birthdays, nor any parties. I never went to clubs to dance and hang out with someone from school. I never had friends over to talk to. I only had myself and my radio. My music was my only escape in my mind.
Well now I am older, I am married and have one child but, I am very lonely. My husband works a lot to pay our bills and to be a good provider that when he comes home all he does is eat and sleep. Again I get very lonely. I think of leaving the world. No one comes to visit me, no one calls me. I am very alone I just sometime feel like ending my own life and saying goodbye. I always say no one will miss me (so just do it) just kill yourself and get it over with. But, I always remember that I have a daughter to take care of. She is my pride and joy. But, these thought keep going though my head. I wish I was never born
Anyone please talk to me.
