Tried For A Year To Do It

after i got kicked out a high school i developed an addiction to tylenol PM's. I would take about 5 a mouthful and about 10-15 a night. every night i hoped i wouldn't wake up the next morning or night. i sometimes drugged myself right after waking up so i wouldn't have to be awake and have the chance to think. i was lost and every night i hoped it would end with the pills for good. my therapist asked my parents to not let me have them and hide them from me. i would yell and throw things and eventually skisoid would give in and give them to me not caring while the a hole couldn't be bothered with me to care.

i still don't know how i actually survived it all to this day and i think i really messed up my body with it but i managed to beat it. i had a single moment of clarity and of strength and asked the A hole to take the pills away from me. he said yes and left... and left the pills right in front of me not caring. so kind he is to me -______-. i knew i had to stop it myself so i grabbed the big thing of it and poured it down the toilet and flushed. luckily my sleep stabilized for a bit so the withdrawal wasn't as bad as i thought it would be. i would still take one every once and a while but i haven't taken anything in a long time. i may not sleep for **** now but i'm cleaner than before and doing better. i honestly don't know how i survived though.. though i think my current kidney pains may be from what i was like before,