I would love to say that I have put all that nonsense behind me...but then I would be lying to all of you..and more importantly..myself. Even with all that I have..well..that doesn't make that deep dark seated pain go away..it just makes me hide it better. I've become a very good actress and most of the time..no one knows how bad it can get. I have had my stomach pumped before and even being such a horrible experience...(I was awake) that didn't make me say..Wow..I'll never try that again. It isn't something that one day you wake up and all the **** is behind you forever. It takes time and perhaps more strength than I possess right now. I will only promise to try my best and not give up for the people that care..but as of now..that is the best I can do. Flag me, block me, I really don't care..I will not hide my feelings anymore. It's too hard and I'm tired of acting.
Written on August 31st, 2009