No More Eyelashes.....

I started pulling my eyelashes out at 12 years old and I remember walking with the guy I liked and this girl shouts out "OH MY GOD!!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOUR EYES! SHE HAS NO EYELASHES!!!!" I went to the bathroom and cried there for 45 minutes. It was humiliating. I didn't know what was wrong with me. I figured because I wasnt aloud to wear make up that I pulled my eyelashes out because there was no reason for them. But when my parents noticed 1 year later (13) then they would tell me "don't do that, it's so ugly, that's like cutting yourself." of course I listened and tried my hardest to stop but couldn't! No matter what I did I couldn't stop! It was the weirdest feeling, I would barely even touch one eyelash an I would get this sensation to pull it out. And once I did, the eyelash next to it would get the same sensation. And then the next and the next till they were all gone. I mostly get the sensation at night when im going to sleep and I would be up so late because I would be scared if it would be noticeable and I would get up and check my eyelashes constantly. Somehow I let those ones grow back, but I started pulling out the lashes on the outer corner of my eyes. This way I can fan out the middle lashes to block the giant bald spots. But with the bald spots I put a little eyeliner to cover it up. It's still noticeable but not as much. I'm in 9th grade almost 15 and people always ask me what eyelash curler I use because my eyelashes are so long and pretty. I must cover it up really good because my parents haven't noticed in almost 2 years. But I just learned about my condition Trichotillomania. My boyfriend is also helping me research more because he cares so much about me. Tomorrow i am going to tell my parents about Trichotillomania, and hopefully they will help me get professional help. I feel like I need it big time. Thanks for reading my story, I just had to get it out...