It Has A Name!

I believe I have a severe case of trichillomania. I started plucking my eyebrows when I was 6. Before my parents thought it was a phase. I'd pluck them until they were bare and only had eyelashes. I started plucking my lashes when I got to 2nd trade. I think I started on the lashes because my 2nd grade teacher who was REALLY mean traumatized me. She'd yell at the class as if we were in a boot camp. When school got out just imagine how relieved everyone felt to go home! But because I had trouble in math she'd keep me after class. Every day I tried making sure I run out of there at the end of school, then she started taking my backpack and putting it up in high places to make sure I couldn't go nowhere. I felt like her main target. She had no patience whatsoever with children to be an elementary teacher. I'd even cry and refuse to go to school. Throughout all these years I've been plucking my eyebrows and eyelashes I've been getting in lots of trouble. Whoopings, groundings, yelled at, being questioned and I was never able to explain what it was when people asked. I think out of all the people that questioned me I was mocked by only one person and that was in 5th grade. I was never too shy to explain it, but I never knew about trich. There's been times where my eyebrows would almost fully grow back but I'd get the urge to pluck them all over again, then being scared of facing my parents. When I was 12 and I was starting 7th grade I started wearing shades so that no one could see my eyes. I just told anyone that questioned it that my eyes are photosensitive and I'm prone to catching migranes and the shades help prevent that, which is actually somewhat true because without lashes m eyes don't have any shading from the sun so I use to squinch a lot. I never penciled on eyebrows, I just had them the way they are. Everywhere I go I always wear glasses. Bug eye glasses. It even inspired a new style for me. I don't pull out my scalp hair; I was popular for being " that girl with the hair and glasses". I always wore my hair puffed, curled, and wild and had my huge glasses. I'm 16 now and it's still the same thing. I didn't discover that my odd habit is a result of a real disorder until just Monday night; I had the urge to pluck that night so I decided to google up " habit of plucking". I can't believe that out of these 10 years my parents never tried to look up my problem. They always made me think I was the only one with this bad habit. Now that I've told them, dad thinks its an excuse. I have full support from mom; she had my problem when she was 2, but stopped when she told me how she got her fingers burned. These are just ways I prevent myself from plucking: modeling clay, rubbing something soft and smooth, video games, hanging out with friends Nd family, drawing, and doing research on the Internet. It's never good to be isolated. I use to be ashamed of myself and this habit and I wasn't very open about it to everyone. Now that I know my habit is a diagnosed disorder with a name, I'm relieved and I'm glad I'm not the only one. I only wish that the people who have it and don't admit that they do pull any hair would open up so that the world would acknowledge trich and finally realize how serious it is.
Deevo Deevo
18-21, F
Nov 30, 2012