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Trich

hey im 15 years old and i have trich.  it all started around when i was in 4th or 5th grade.  it took a while for my parents to notice the problem, and it took even longer for us to figure out what it was. 

trich is hard.  it feels like there's no one out there that understands how you feel.  you try to hide it, but people tend to notice and eventually ask about it anyway.  your parents may not understand completely.  they may think that oyu have complete control of it.  they may think you do it just because you want to, and that's all there is to it.  in my case, my parents read about it and try to help. but sometimes i'm better off without it.  it's difficult to talk about it. 

i think we try to hide it because we're afraid of how someone without it would react.  what if they think its weird or gross?  what if they dont want to talk to you anymore?  if the person is a real friend, they won't laugh or make fun of you.  they'll accept you for who you are, trich and all. 

in my case, when i feel upset, nervous, angry or just bored, i resort to pulling, for me, eyelashes.  even when i'm upset because i have trich, i pull.  it seems to be some kind of release.  i feel better after i do it.  i dont know why.  its a strange feeling.  its almost like the emotions fall away with the lashes.  its hard for people without trich to truly understand, but if they try, it really shows that they care and want to help you.

all in all, trich has definitely had an impact on my life.  for example, i'm less confident, i'm shy, and don't handle stress well.  i've tried a lot of things to help me, but none of them have worked.  if anyone has any idea, i'm soooo open for suggestions.  my life would be very different without trich, but i feel that everything happens for a reason.  maybe i have trich because i need to get over it to be strong enough to handle something that happens to me later in life.  who knows?  i try to keep a positive attitude, but its hard sometimes.  i can go a couple of days without pulling, but then i feel like its useless and i shouldnt evenn bother trying.  thus, the painful cycle of trich continues.  round and round we go. 

i'm sooo glad i found other people with trich!  i really hope that i'll get some help, and i also hope i can help other people, too!  maybe by sharing experiences, giving tips and support, or just being there to listen. 

thanks for taking the time to read this.  =]

jessmess2 jessmess2 16-18, F 2 Responses Oct 1, 2007

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my parents think i can stop if i try, but she doesn't understand that i cant control it

You are lucky that you got a diagnosis and have understanding parents. I started pulling in 1965 and NOTHING was known about it. Have you checked out the Trichotilomania Learning Center in Santa Cruz, CA. They have yearly retreats and conferences. Google them.They do good things!