No Friends For Me

I have been outgoing my entire life. I needed to be because my folks moved around quite often. I have technically been to 5 different high schools. Since being an adult I have lived in Arizona, Mississippi, England, and Colorado. In Arizona, where I grew up I had some friends, but very few would make an effort to be with me. In Mississippi, I had no friends, but I was only there for 9 months. In England I have a could of friends, mostly through my husband but I made a few on my own.

One young woman that I became friends with happened very quickly but it was amazing. We hung out often, both of us were stay at home mum and about the same age, also married about the same amount of time. I would travel an hour by train just to hang out and she would do the same. Then some day after Thanksgiving of 2011 she just stopped talking to me. No text, no calling, not home when I would get there. I wish I knew what I did wrong, I thought I was finally going to have a lifetime friendship (with someone other then my husband).

Now I am in Colorado. I have been lucky to make a friend (also friends with her boyfriend, so maybe two friends). I have been using a website to make more friends because I do not have a job outside the house, I dont go to school and only my father in law is close by. I recent returned my car to family and have none.

On this website, were all the people are looking for other people (friends, relationship, one night stands, whatever). You would think that the people looking for friends might actually want to find friends. One young woman agreed that we should hang out, so she gave me her address. It was fantastic that she didnt live far because I was going to pick her up then go get coffee or something. I waited for my boys to wake from their nap then got them ready so I could make a friend (I generally dont drive, story for another day). When I got to her place I rang the doorbell twice and knocked twice. Then I noticed a note in the door saying that "it was too soon and she couldnt handle it". I didnt make her give me her address, then on the website she deleted her profile. I didnt realize I was that horrible.

I have had a few people say they want to hang out then never follow through, or people that would say they want to come over but never do. Another young lady came over and we hit it off right away. She lived a distance away so she actually spent the night the first night then went to work. I lived closer to her work then she did. She would come over for lunch and I would make her meals. The second night she stayed with me something bad happened to her in her home. I knew she would have a lot to take care of but we are friends now so I will be there for her. I guess I was wrong; after becoming friends and hitting it off she moved to another state without a notice (its the notice part that would have been nice) and hasnt spoken to me since. Once again, I dont know what I did wrong.

I know that I am super outgoing and when I like somebody I become attached, if we click I think it will work out. But I have 1 childhood friend that doesnt talk to me unless I go to Arizona (where she lives) and one young adult friend (who also lives in Arizona) that doesnt chat to me a lot either.

I do have a lot of friends but all of them are online, in Second Life. I dont have a problem with that but I also need real human interaction. I want to hang out on the couch eating popcorn and watching a movie. I want a friend that I can go out and do stuff with.

I dont know what to do any more, except keep trying and hold out hope.
justcallmeque justcallmeque
22-25, F
May 25, 2012