The Doormat

Kind, devoted, loyal, tender-hearted, giving, compassionate, sincere...these are all words that describe me very accurately. That being said, you would think people would be lining up outside my door to sign up as my friend. I try and spoil people that I love. I'm always there for them, no matter what time of day it is. Over the years, however; I've noticed that I cannot keep friends. My best friend from childhood grew to dislike me once we got older. The "friends" that I do have now never invite me to do anything within their inner circle (although, they sure don't mind rubbing it in how much fun they had), but I'm the first one they come to when they need advice or help with something. I've spent countless hours trying to figure out what it is about me that my so-called friends don't like. The ones my age are the worst. I find that I get along much better with older of my best friends is about 45...I'm 28. In fact, most older people just love me to death. I'm not shy, so I'm pretty fun in social settings. I'm intelligent, so I catch everyone's jokes. I'm always trying to make people feel better about themselves. It just doesn't make sense. What am I missing? In the rare event that I do get invited somewhere, any photos that have me in it never make it to anyone's picture frames or Facebook page. It's like people intentionally single those out and delete them.

I've really almost gotten to the point that I don't want to try anymore. Just cut my losses and tell those that come to me and need help to just buzz off and go ask one of their other buddies to deal with it. It's not my nature though. I will probably continue to be the doormat and stop what I'm doing to help those people out, even though they don't seem to care about me.

Has anyone had this same problem? Did you ever figure out why? If someone would just come out and tell me that I'm annoying, or I'm too nice, blah blah blah, then at least I would know what to work on. It's rather frustrating to say the least.

Thanks for listening to my rant! :)


VenusVegas VenusVegas
26-30, F
2 Responses Jul 26, 2010

I have always been the youngest in my groups, over the years. Even now, I like to say I'm the baby, ha ha. You say it is not your nature to say NO, well pet, learn how to say it. Don't be at everyones beck and call. Enjoy your 'older' friends...and you will sure make them notice you.

I don't know, Casey. You sound great to me. All I can say is I believe what Rick Nelson said many years ago: "You can't please everyone so you've got to please yourself." Good luck to you!