To Trust The Instincts Or Not

I have trouble making decisions. I usually have to force myself to make the decision. Usually making the wrong choice feels better in the end than if I were to not act at all. And, ironically, making the right choice usually is a little bit harder than making the wrong choice. I have not been able to figure out why that is. I am constantly being faced with hard decisions.

Heres a low key example. My dad wanted me to come paddling with him and his coworkers. I went to high school at the school at which my dad teaches. I was kind of a trouble maker, and some of the teachers he wanted me to go paddling with were ones I had gotten in trouble from and so I felt awkward and embarrased about paddling in their canoe. I ended up forcing myself to go and really enjoyed the experience.

A lot of times, its memories of my past that hurt my ability to make the right decision. I have pretty low self confidence, as well. I almost never regret going out and hanging out with people; however, my confidence issues sometimes get in the way of making the right decision - to go out.

Asking out girls is always a really hard thing to do, especially if the girl is my friend. I have such low confidence that I almost always think the girl will reject me and our friendship will become awkward. That assumption is almost always wrong.

My solution has been to live life with the mantra "enjoy life. work hard". With that attitude, Im CONFIDENT things will work out, no matter what choices I make.


oceanIsMyBreath oceanIsMyBreath
22-25, M
Jun 1, 2012