There's no real way to make this long story short-but I could use some advice.

My husband and I had a baby before we even started dating. One night stand. Anyway-he was a real loser. Smoked a lot of weed, lived with his parents, spent every dime he made on drugs and alcohol. Well then our daughter was born and he did a total 180. Shortly after her birth, we started dating. He had a previous arrest that he wanted to get taken off his record after we had been together a few months, so he started PTI and had to take random drug tests for a year. We got engaged, were married, blah blah blah. So his PTI ended a month into our marriage and thus begins the lies. I caught him several times with weed, he would deny it no matter how much evidence I had. He told me he would stop, and I believed him. But of course he didn't. More lies. More drama. More tears. Well finally I told him I was leaving unless he got help. So his PCP gave him klonopin. Which of course he took to much of and lied to me about, but he wasn't smoking weed. Then in October he had surgery and was on pain killers-which started a whole new spiral. I thought he was okay. He told me he was okay. I was also was pregnant with our second child at this time. In November our oldest was diagnosed with pediatric cancer and since then he has been lying to me and fighting with me about weed. I'm fed up. Our daughter is in remission and will be done with treatment in December. I've given him until then to get on meds for his anxiety/depression and to get straight. I don't know if I'll have the strength to leave or even if I should leave at that point.
parismonkey parismonkey
26-30, F
3 Responses Aug 19, 2014

I tell you something somebody should've told me talk let everything out first of all your stressed let some of of friends or family have it. Now once you feel better give him your ear and not in a aggressive way. Just keep peeking him for answers trust he'll break maybe even cry but either way it's for the best

Do what's best for ur kids. This is decision is important because a mistake could ruins a child's life. It's ur choice, hope everything is ok. God bless.

If he stays the same than I think that you should leave him. As a woman you should be perfectly capable to raise your children on your own. In know many strong women who had great marriages and then their husbands either started gambling or done worse things and they left. My mum always says to me, you should have children only if you feel that you are capable to raise them on your own. And I don't know if I'm losing my point. But if marriage brings more negative things than positive ones you should end it.