15 Looooooonnnnggg Years

Celticlass8, I hear you blaming yourself alot. Stop. Stop right now. There's an expression, "You need to put the war hammer down and stop whacking yourself." It sounds to me like the marriage to the gay man and the subsequent relationships have traumatized you. I think there are a couple of things that you need to do before getting into a relationship:



1. Release the old pain. It serves no purpose other than to prevent you from moving forward. It weighs you down and holds you back from getting what you so desperately want and most assuredly deserve :LOVE!!!



2. Loving yourself FIRST. Put yourself first in everything. It's not self-ish. It's telling the Universe, you are the most important thing in your life and deserve to be treated well. First and foremost, you need to love and accept EVERY PART of YOU. Love, accept, and admire all that you are. The Universe/God doesn't make junk. You are already perfect. Tell your angels what you want. Get really clear on this. EXACTLY what you want. Remember that. I want you to listen to me really well here. Get CLOSER to the screen. Are you close?? Here it comes. Listen closely. Judge Moongal39 has issued a decree:

"WHATEVER CRIMES OR MISTAKES YOU THINK YOU'VE COMMITTED, I HEREBY COMMUTE YOUR SENTENCE. YOU ARE FOREVER MORE FREE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE AS YOU CHOOSE, UNIMPEDED BY THE PAST, THE PRESENT, OR ASSUMED FEAR OF THE FUTURE. THE RIGHT MAN, THE MAN THAT TRULY LOVES YOU TO THE DEPTH OF HIS SOUL, THE MAN THAT WILL STAND BY YOU NO MATTER WHAT, WILL UNDERSTAND THAT YOU HAVEN'T HAD SEX IN YEARS. THIS LOVING MAN WILL ONLY BE INTERESTED IN BEING WITH YOU. HE ISN'T GOING TO JUDGE YOU FOR NOT HAVING SEX IN YEARS. IN FACT, HE MIGHT TAKE IT AS A COMPLIMENT THAT YOU WAITED FOR THE RIGHT RELATIONSHIP (WITH HIM). THINK ABOUT THIS. SERIOUSLY. WHEN SOMEONE LOVES YOU, TRULY LOVES YOU, THE LOVE ALL OF YOU. NO ONE IS PERFECT. IF WE WERE, WE WOULDN'T BE HERE ON THE EARTH PLANE. EVERYONE HAS SOMETHING TO LEARN. SINCE YOU WERE CATHOLIC IN A PAST LIFE, I WILL QUOTE (try to, lol) SCRIPTURE HERE: "LET HE WHO HAS NOT SINNED, CAST THE FIRST STONE." YOU COMMITTED NO SIN. PERIOD.

(word, isn't she? LOL)



3. Look up Radical Forgiveness and do this.



4. Visit this website, www.emofree.com. Excellent for releasing old pains, hurts, anything. THE BEST!



5. Start using affirmations: "I deserve to be loved. I am loved. All is well and I am loved. All is well. I am in relationships that are unconditionally loving, supportive, and nurturing. The right people and the right situations are already here and will show up on time (Dr. Wayne Dyer said that one). Buy books from Louise Hay (You Can Heal Your Life, Meditations to Heal Your Life, etc..Books by Dr. Wayne Dyer (Excuses Be Gone, Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life, Your Erroneous Zones. Books by Shakti Gawain (Creative Visualization, etc) and when your thoughts get more positive and you change your core beliefs about yourself through Theta energy work, EFT, and/or NLP, start learning how to use the laws of attraction. There is a book called "The Law of Attraction" by Jerry and Esther Hicks. Only use the laws once you have changed your core beliefs, otherwise you're just going to continue to attract more of what you have been receiving in your life.



6. Meditate. Yoga. Tai Chi. Qi Gong. Walks in nature. Anything to calm and quiet the mind. Keep the mental chatter to a minimum.



7. Do you have any unresolved childhood traumas from abuse or anything else? Any pain from any part of your life that you haven't resolved? Resolve them now. Use the EFT, NLP, Reiki, or Theta energy work to do so.



8.Give away any and all old gifts or things from past relationships. They only serve to remind you of the past. You want to focus on the present and look forward to the present. You don't want to dwell in the past.



9. Act as if the person is already here. Write a love story. Draw or paint a picture representing this relationship.



10. Clear out the clutter. No new energy can come in if the old clutter is blocking it. Energy flows only if there isn't stagnation. The stagnation is the clutter.



11. Think of an interest you have. Whatever interest that is, join a group (s).



12. Be of service. Volunteer and give back. Donate.



13. Buy fresh flowers and keep them in the house. You always want something living in your home for good energy. Plants and flowers are wonderful.



15. Clean up your diet, get exercise, go for acupuncture treatments. When you take care of yourself and treat yourself lovingly, the Universe follows and provides you with people and situations that are loving and that do take care of you. Remember, energy returns to you, so be honest, fair, and just with others (I know you already are, I thought I would just remind you though).



16. Now that you're loving yourself, now sit down with a piece of paper and write down every quality that you desire in a man. How about soulmate love? Perhaps you can find ways to attract Soulmate or Twinmate love. GO FOR IT!! YOU'RE WORTH IT!!!



I sincerely hope all of this helps. Be well and just know that you are not alone. EVER. There are other women in the world who have been where you are. When you are ready, it will happen. Put in the time and effort to make some changes- you will see the results.



It's time to find your passion in life. Whatever that is, do it. Whatever makes you happy, do it. Baking, dancing, crocheting, writing, anything....Do it! When you find your passion, you align with Divinity, with the Universe. I don't care if you think its trivial or whatever, do whatever it is that makes you happy.



I will tell you a secret: You have the matches because you are the matches. You are the spark, you are the flame. If you gave "your matches" (your power) away to someone else, lovingly take them back now. You've waited long enough to be happy. Your happiness starts now, if you want it to. Good luck!